Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam

Because you asked

2011-03-10T09:25:00.001-05:00

Dear Internet,

As a foodie, I'm faced with a certain dilemma. One the one hand I could stand to eat hunks of cow on a regular basis, yet my vanity isn't down with that and my sense of mortality seconds the motion. The solution is to "stretch" the beef component, so my tastebuds get to groove on all the beefy deliciousosity without needing to wrap myself outside a steak the size of a hubcap.

So, here is one of my fave ways of doing just that. Beef Negamaki.

Start with a fairly small portion of none-too-precious (any member of the "round" family) beef. Tenderness is not an issue, but deeply beefy flavor is.
Wrap the beef in plastic. (Cheapskate that I am, I use the same wrap whence it came.) Whack it with a meat mallet. You want it as thin and flattened as possible without tearing.
Once flattened, put trimmed scallion/green onion/spring onion/these things segments along the length. Roll up tight. You should be able to wrap twice around, otherwise use a toothpick to secure. (figure 1/2 lb. beef for 6 scallions)

Now, make a glaze/dipping sauce.
Let your taste be your guide. I like soy sauce, sesame seeds & peanut oil (w. a dash of sesame oil), TINY bit of fresh garlic and fresh ginger, TINY bit of red pepper flakes, lemon and [not pictured] a smallish spoonful of light brown sugar. Stir to dissolve sugar. Adjust to taste. (In my case the proportions of soy:lemon:oil are 3:1:1, but taste and adjust as you go.)
Coat the beef LIGHTLY with peanut oil -- or whatever you're not allergic to -- for two reasons, so the beef doesn't stick to the grates and so the seasonings don't draw out the juices of the beef. That done, salt and pepper the beef rolls and throw on the grill. (It was raining so we used the indoor grill.)Flip over and brush the TOP SIDE with the glaze/soy thing. You want it to caramelize, not burn. Then you flip over again and glaze the other side. Repeat. You want a deeeeeeeeep brown crust.
Give the remaining glaze a quick boil (microwave is fine) to thicken up and eliminate any microbial interlopers. (A TEENSY bit of cornstarch/water solution will help if you like your glazes the consistency of, say, BBQ sauce.) Plate with some spinach salad on the side and veggie potstickers. (More on that soon. I had some saved up in the freezer.)

The spinach is dressed with a miso-wasabi dressing, note the dipping sauce and the sake cups with the STELLAR Sam Adams Black Lager, because I'm geeky like that. You're supposed to slice the beef into bite-sized rolls, like this.

But it was late.

And we were hungry.

And I forgot.

-J.

Missed me?

2011-03-09T18:04:00.001-05:00

Being all Papist and stuff, we observe a fast on Ash Wednesday. Iberic tradition holds the fast to keep until after sunset (or, as it's called in Spain, "lunchtime") and even then, no meat or poultry need apply. So, I made one of TFBIM's faves, Black (i.e. Squid Ink) Spaghetti and Shrimp with Puttanesca Sauce.

First you need garlic (I used 4 big cloves, you non-Mediterraneans'll probably wanna halve that), sliced as finely as your patience your allow. Several of you have emailed me asking what "as finely as your patience your allow" means. It means this:

Take a small yellow onion, and chop it to the limits of your patience, also.Assemble the rest of the ingredients.Anchovy paste (I like Amore, and in this case I prefer the paste over the whole fillets, because these dissolve far better in a sauce), capers, squid in spaghetti, red pepper flakes. [Not pictured: Shrimp, & dried herbs (oregano, thyme & marjoram)] Oh, and also olives (I prefer Gaeta) which I marinated in herbs and EVOO. You'll need both the olives and the marinating EVOO. Oh, and tomatoes. This is my favorite brand. You can use crushed, chopped or strained, depending on your desired chunkiness. I like it medium chunky, hence the "chopped."Put a couple of tablespoonfuls of the marinating EVOO in a skillet over medium heat.

Once it starts shimmering add red pepper flakes to taste. I use 1/4 teaspoon, you might want to start with just a pinch and work on up therefrom. You want the flavor of the flakes to permeate the oil. Throw in the garlic slices, again you want the flavor to be shot through the oil also. However, you don't want it to brown, so after 10-15 seconds... You toss in the onions, stir a bit and then add the anchovy paste (about two inches, and NO it's not a worm...sheesh). Cook over medium-low heat until the onions become translucent. Add the tomatoes. Stir. Taste. Cook until the brightness is muted a little. Adjust salt and pepper. Keep the salt on light side, because the capers (about which, more anon) will also add saltiness. Put a large pot full of water to boil. Once boiling add a good tablespoon of salt and then toss in the pasta. When it's al dente (7-8 minutes, but start tasting at about 5 minutes, because there are a lot of variables at play here) drain the pasta (leaving behind a couple of ounces of the water). And return to the pot, set heat to low, add shrimp.

You may be tempted to get humongous shrimps (or prawns). Don't. Get someting in the "31-40" size, or slightly smaller. You want, ideally, for the shrimp to be half a mouthful, that you may twirl pasta and spear shrimp for the best taste...and still have it fit in your mouth. The ones here are 31-40s, and those were a touch large. 41-50s would be better. However, the smaller the shrimp, the easier it is to overcook. So watch it!

Stir. When the shrimp start changing color, add the sauce, stir and take the pot off-heat. The residual heat will continue to cook the shrimp. You should end up with something like this:

And the capers.If you are allowing yourself some of the fruit of the vine and the work of human hands, open the wine. You want something not too heavily oaked, with decent fruit and acid. This "lightweight" Chardonnay is ideal, with juicy pineapple-ish notes that play off the mild spiciness and good acid to counteract the saltiness.Have

Have a blessed Lent.

-J.

Prayers needed for my dad.

2010-01-19T20:02:00.001-05:00

Just wanted to bring you up to speed on something and, ask for your prayers. On Sunday, my dad fell out of bed in his sleep and fractured his humerus. He walked into Doctor's Hospital's ER, after 11 hours (!) there he was admitted; surgery was considered and subsequently ruled out.

Since he suffers from both Parkinson's and Alzheimer's the fall, fracture and subsequent hospitalization has seen an exceedingly sharp decline in his condition. He is completely incoherent, disoriented and agitated and not recovering from that state. What seemed like a moderate medical annoyance has now become a potentially grave health crisis.

Tonight my mom, sister and I had to have The Extraordinary Measures Talk. It was saddening and surreal to select from a "menu" of possible actions. "Yes, No, Yes, Yes, No."

Yes, this is pretty bloody awful.

AMDG,

-J.

Fr. Arrupe's 102nd Anniversary

2009-11-14T18:08:00.003-05:00

I thought it worth posting this "Golden Oldie."

AMDG,

-J.

Into the lion's den.

2009-11-13T21:52:00.003-05:00

What have I gotten myself into?

AMDG,

-J.

Policy change.

2009-10-15T01:51:00.004-04:00

UPDATE: The America Magazine blog comment policy has been amended again. Commenters needn't be subscribers, but they MUST register. This strikes us as eminently fair. We will not take credit for this change, nor will be start swanning about smugly, because God hates it when we do that, and often makes His displeasure felt. Commenters here from said magazine will not be required to sign the Mandatum in order to comment. Only those with S.J. appended to their name.
**********************************************************************
America Magazine's blog now only allows comments from paid subscribers. A cynical person -- not I, but a cynical person -- might say this is a subtle but exceedingly effective way to sharply curtail dissenting* opinions in the combox discussions appended to each post. America Magazine and its blog has a clear ideological slant, and ideological slant is likely to be subsidized by those whose jib is similarly cut, and therefore, by excluding those whose ideological tilt would preclude them from financially supporting America Magazine with subscription dollars, the cynics might say, America Magazine has managed to institute a chilling effect on commenters who might bring an unwelcome viewpoint to online discussions.

In unrelated news, any commenter on this blog from America Magazine will be required to sign the Mandatum before the comment is posted.

AMDG,

-J.

* No, the irony is not lost on me.

Yeah, sure, you're pro-life, but are you any good at it?

2009-10-08T09:57:00.004-04:00

Something's been bouncing around in my head these last few weeks, after the President's address at Notre Dame and having heard, ceaselessly, from those Professional Catholics who made it a point of defending both the university and the President.

There was one refrain which I heard from these folks over and over again. Something to the effect of "...and I'm really, REALLY pro-life, so don't misunderstand me..."

First, it was great to see these folks feeling the need to preemptively explain themselves. After all, those of us on THIS side of the ideological divide have often felt the compulsion to preface half of what we say by stating that, yes, we actually DO care for the poor and the oppressed.

Second, it was fun to see most of their arguments include the dog-eared trope of "Well, when President Bush..." (It seems abundantly clear to me these benighted folks intend to run against Bush for the next 50 years, sort of how they ran against Hoover until 1956.)

Third, I received much not-so-innocent pleasure from watching the exegetical Cirque de Soleil contortions these guys underwent as they tried to explain how President Obama was actually closer to Catholic social teaching than anyone else, ever!

So, other than the very foundational building block from which every single solitary tenet of Catholic social doctrine springs, he's right on board with us, says the Progressive Catholic Guild. Without the merest chemical trace of irony.

The hallmark of the PCG is that yes, one may vote for a candidate who views abortion favorably and has a stellar record as far as NARAL is concerned; provided, natch, that said candidate is simpatico with their interpretation of Catholic social doctrine, preferably one having a strong statist flavor. Then they trot out the aged and venerable "seamless garment" hypothesis which they wish everyone to believe is the only possible way in which the poor and oppressed may achieve prosperity and freedom.

But they remain, they assert, stalwart pro-lifers.

So, in the interest of science, let's take this argument at face value. Let us suppose the entire membership of the PCG is, adamantly, ardently -- to coin the phrase -- pro-life. Close your eye and imagine that, if that helps.

There.

Got that picture in your mind's eye?

Good.

Now ask the following -- and, as is my wont, impertinent -- question: "What has THAT accomplished?"

"Yes, you PCGers are all a pack of raving pro-lifers and no other issue matters more to you than those of life. Your soul aches at the carnage wrought by the abortion industry and all that. But where has THAT gotten us?"

See, the problem is that the PCG has never been able to put more, er, visible issues (poverty, oppression, etc.) in a subsidiary position to that of abortion and other life issues. They are, I firmly believe, congenitally incapable of doing so. Therefore, they vote for the candidates who are adamantly NOT pro-life and who, at most, cast glittering rhetorical pearls of lip-service ("I intend to reduce the number of abortions...") and allow them to assuage their consciences and rationalize their votes.

The fact remains and will remain that there will never be a change in the abortion laws in the USA (or anywhere, really) until a critical mass of legislators, jurists, and executives has been reached and held. Not just a majority because the majority might be enuretic (as we saw from 1994-2006) or the minority might be obstinate (ditto).

So, PCGers, if you're really serious about being pro-life...ask yourself this question:

"Has my voting record helped to overthrow or helped to entrench the culture of abortion?"

AMDG,

-J.

The Cuban Sandwich

2009-10-05T16:02:00.007-04:00

Here is the RIGHT way to do this.

Start by slicing pickles. NOT the sweet kind, and (ideally) not the ones that sit at room temperature. You need the crunch. I'spose you could get away with the pre-sliced ones, but I like my surface:mass ratio just so, and the Pickle Industrial Complex will not comply.
Take Cuban bread, or Cuban rolls or, if you live in the provinces, something in the egg bread family (which turns this from a Cubano to a Medianoche, but whatever.) split them and mustardize them. The classic choice is plain ol' yellow mustardbut I like the "deli" style mustard better. You do whatever you want.
Then you lay down your pickle coverage. I love pickles, so I practically TILE the bloody thing.
Over the pickles you'll need to place a layer of ham. Since I am an insufferable foodie, I use prosciutto (but not the hyper-fancy stuff). Either way, you want to make sure it's sliced so thin, as to be translucent. This allows you to plop it down in a wavy sort of way, which is key to get the right sort of chew and mouthfeel.
Next,the swiss cheese. Yes, it must be swiss cheese. Or, if you're insufferable as I am, Swiss cheese (Emmentaler is a teeny bit preferable to Gruyere, but either is wonderful.)
To get the right melting action, you will need to grate it. Yes, slices will work okay, but by the time the cheese is melted, the bread will be too dry and brittle.
Shredding it in the food processor is fine, but yields bad photos. So I hand grated. Just for YOU, Internet. Scoop it up and get ready to apply to the sandwich.
Like so.
If you like to give the cheese a head start on the melting -- or you are a raving pyro -- you can use a kitchen torch.
Now, take your leftover roast pork (ideally a very citrus/garlic intensive roast pork, although that can be doctored up) which you have warmed up to about 125F (this is important) if you have roasted it properly, it should shred into luxuriant, pillowy nuggets of porcine goodness.Assemble atop the cheese (cold side cold, warm side warm). You want about a 3:2 pork:ham ratio. So that your whole assemblage looks like this.
Fold the bread around the filling. Place in a panini/sanwich press or, if you have a whole battalion to feed, use a griddle set to medium-high, buttered lightly -- DO NOT USE MARGARINE -- and toast the cheese side first until it JUST melts, and then flip over to warm the other side.
Eat.
-J.

A (practical) history lesson

2009-10-01T21:07:00.002-04:00

It's 1521. You're a chieftain of some lovely Pacific island. You have the most women, the biggest hut, your pick of outrigger canoes. Life is good. Then some big ships show up. "Great. MORE Europeans." The Europeans make friends with your rival chieftain from the other side of the island. You snub everyone. The Europeans take the snub as a snub and choose to attack you. But they misjudge the tide and leap into water waist deep in full armor, and too far to use their weapons.

You slaughter them all, especially the leader.

That leader was Magellan. Immortalized by the Magellan Straits and also that GPS* thingy, among other things.

You?

You're chief Lapu-Lapu and you're immortalized by a tiki drink served in a cored-out pineapple, most famously at Walt Disney World's Polynesian Resort's Tambu Lounge. This past Labor Day** we went to this very spot. My wife had the selfsame beverage. Verily she loved it and has developed a fondness therefor and I was commissioned to replicate it.

Like so.

You start off with a pineapple. Note the corer. US$3 on eBay. Before I get more carried away with this, let me say I cannot say enough good things about this cheap-o corer. Yes, you can get fancier ones, made of stainless steel with sharper blades and finer teeth. These will give you less jagged pineapple rings, if that means that much to you. I, personally, couldn't care less about the aesthetic qualities of the rings...so the extra 600% premium isn't worth it.

You lop the top off, much like Lapu-Lapu's warriors seemed to have preferred. (Hence the name?)

All you have to do to core out the pineapple is center the corer right on the, er, core of the pineapple and drive the corer in, twisting with slight downward pressure. When you get down as far as you want, you pull up as with a manual corkscrew.

Et voilà

TIP: Place the pineapple being cored inside bowl of some kind, as there WILL be juice spouting forth generously and you want to capture said juice. This will also keep your wife from exhibiting displeasure.

1 tsp Simple "2:1" syrup

1 tsp Passion fruit syrup (50-50 passion fruit pulp and 2:1 sugar syrup)

1 tsp Orgeat

2 oz Orange juice (absent any fresh-squeezed, I suggest Florida Natural)

2 oz Pineapple juice (absent any fresh-squeezed -- you'll recall above I said you wanted the fresh juice -- I suggest Dole)

2 oz Dark rum (Bacardi 8 in this case)

2 oz White Rum (I like Cruzan Aged Light, but I was trying to finish up the Bacardi Silver)

[Picture would have gone here, but Joey was getting hollered at by my beloved.]

Put this all in a shaker with about 6oz of cracked ice. Then you shake...

...and shake. Until the tin of the shaker frosts over.

TIP: With any drink calling for syrups, juices, etc. and you're only using ONE measuring vessel (i.e. a jigger or shot glass) do so in this order: syrups THEN juices THEN any flavored liquors or liqueurs THEN the spirits.

And here you are.
(all photos -- both the excellent and unsuitable ones -- courtesy of Joey)

-J.

*SatNav to the rest of the Anglosphere.

** First Monday in September to the rest of the Anglosphere.

Dinner.

2009-09-04T05:18:00.002-04:00

We are winning.

2009-09-03T13:27:00.001-04:00

The lovely and gracious Karen won't believe me, but it's true.

We are winning.

AMDG,

-J.

What to make of Ted Kennedy?

2009-08-31T11:20:00.002-04:00

Right up front, I'll get to some disclosures about the late Sen. Kennedy.

1) I never met him.
2) On the basis of ideology, I really, really disagreed with him on pretty much everything.
3) He seems to have been a man with a lot of demons. (I'm guessing being Joe Kennedy Sr.'s son couldn't have such a treat.)
4) The panegyrics to him drive me up the wall, far more than he did in life.
5) I prayed for his soul.

I'm one of those people who believed that, in spite of his aggressive and unrelenting support of abortion rights during his career, the fact he seems to have made a Sacramental Confession at his deathbed would allow for a Catholic funeral for him. I would like to believe he repented of his support for abortion and same sex unions and embryonic stem-cell research, etc.

But... somebody somewhere should have made sure his funeral Mass was not the crypto-partisan debacle it turned into.

At some point -- I'm thinking the homily -- it might have been time to highlight the fact his support of these cast a serious pall on his legacy.

I'll set aside other strictly ideological issues (not that adherents of ~~appeasement and redistribution~~ a specific approach to "peace and justice" are doing same) and for the purposes of discussion grant that Sen. Kennedy was, in fact doing what he thought was best to help the downtrodden and so forth.

That still doesn't address a lot of other areas where Sen. Kennedy might have acted out of sync with Catholic teaching. The HuffPo (emphases mine):

"Obama praised Ted for modeling how to struggle intensely against your opponents, but never stooping to demonize or denounce them. Be loud. Be Raucous. Be militant. But be civil."

How that squares with:

"Robert Bork’s America is a land in which women would be forced into back-alley abortions, blacks would sit at segregated lunch counters, rogue police could break down citizens’ doors in midnight raids, schoolchildren could not be taught about evolution, writers and artists could be censored at the whim of the Government, and the doors of the Federal courts would be shut on the fingers of millions of citizens for whom the judiciary is — and is often the only — protector of the individual rights that are the heart of our democracy."

It's one thing for a faithful Catholic to agree with much of what Sen. Kennedy stood for, but quite another to gloss over or minimize his flaws and the consequences of those flaws.

It's supremely ironic that it was Barack Obama who reminded everyone that Ted Kennedy's soul needs prayer*. Because it does, regardless of the paeans and homages.

AMDG,

-J.

* As does mine, maybe even more than his.

Backhanded compliments are still compliments.

2009-08-24T17:16:00.003-04:00

Here is a fun little something I ran across as I tried to get a better handle on the whole "LCWR visitation thing."

To my mind, the answer to the question as to "Why is the Vatican investigating women religious in the USA?" can be best expressed thus: "Because there is no certainty they are espousing unwavering fidelity to the Magisterium of the Church." Throwing around ostensibly pithy phrases such as "creative fidelity" ain't helping, people. (You married folks, try and tell your spouse that you're living a life of creative fidelity to them and then let me know how it went after the paramedics leave.)

Anyway.

Where was I? Ah...yes. Rummaging.

It was in the process of this rummagingness that I ran across some interesting comments by Sr. Laurie Brink, who delivered the keynote address at the 2007 LCWR assembly. Sister was assessing the options available to communities, and she summarized them as follows:

1. Death with Dignity and Grace
2. Acquiescence to Others’ Expectations
3. Sojourning in a New Land not yet Known
4. Reconciliation for the Sake of the Mission

I'll leave to your imagination (or reading, should you feel diligent) what 1, 3 and 4 mean. I want to address Sister's rather, um, opinionatedly titled Option #2.

Here's Sister (starting on pg. 13 of the text of her remarks), with my emphases and comments:

Not every congregation is giving up the ghost sort to speak. Some have attended to their reality and are making choices that a generation ago would have been anathema to their members. These groups are recognizing the changing atmosphere in the institutional Church, the reneging on the promises of Vatican II what those promises might be or, more importantly where they are to be found, and the seemingly conservative because they couldn't possibly be actually conservative young adults interested in pursing a life of holiness through the profession of the evangelical counsels. They are taking seriously Pope John Paul II’s call to pursue holiness first above all else and the problem with that is...what, exactly?. They are putting on the habit, or continuing to wear the habit with zest. They are renewing pious practices such as adoration (!) and the Rosary (!!). They are returning to the classroom.

Some would critique that they are the nostalgic portrait of a time now passed. But they are flourishing...and why?. Young adults are finding in these communities a living image of their romantic view it couldn't possibly be something deeper, right? of Religious Life. They are entering. And they are staying.

It would not be charitable to characterize Sister's comments. But, I think it's fair to highlight these comments note -- begrudgingly and with some editorializing, it seems -- the blossoming of vocations in the more, er, traditional communities.

What strikes me as illuminating are the reasons Sister gives for the current flourishing of these communities.

Just a thought.

AMDG,

-J.

Beef. I like beef.

2009-08-18T09:58:00.002-04:00

In previous discussions elsewhere with the lovely and gracious Karen, the subject of steak came up.

Which prompted me to dig up and complete this post that had been moldering away in a near-forgotten sector. (What the coarse and vulgar population might rudely term my "draft pile." But they'd be wrong.)

Anyway.

Last Christmas I received a sampler pack of seasonings from Williams-Sonoma. Smallish tins of +/- 1 oz. each. Mexican this, Seattle that, etc. Anyway. They had a steak seasoning which I rather enjoyed. But, while one is trudging through The Great Recession, buying the large tin at $10 (!) for a mere 4 oz.* (!!) is not going to happen.

So.

I set about deconstructing it and, frankly, improving it. If you ever pick up these sorts of seasonings you will notice three things at the head of the ingredients list (in the USA, ingredients have to be listed in order, starting with the most abundant one) sugar, salt, and paprika. Sure, they may give them ultra-posh adjectives such as "Herne Bay sea salt" or "Peruvian sun dried paprika" but you must realize these things are cheap filler. Also there were some variants of ingredients which I thought (correctly, as my lab research shows) could be substituted or upgraded.

Thus, I gathered Joey (Davy is more of the quality control tester) and we assembled in the kitchen, gathering our spice jars and an old coffee mill we comandeered AGES ago for the purpose of spice grinding. You will NOT believe how helpful Joey was. He has an eerily accurate palate.

But I digress.

Here is my version. It is, on purpose, NOT identical to the original, because as noted above, I believed I should change some of the things I didn't like "while I was at it." I'll note those as I go.

(This is all by volume, use teaspoons, cups, or whatever.)

3 parts granulated garlic (Usually I'd go for fresh garlic, but in these applications, it'd fall off and/or scorch. So I got a good brand of granulated. The original rub had granulated roast garlic, but I found it got bitter over the chargrill's high/dry heat so I switched...oh, make sure you use the granulated and not the powdered stuff, which often has bizarro ingredients!)

1 part EACH black peppercorns and red pepper flakes (in the original, I couldn't detect much heat from the chile seeds/ribs...but I tend to like a bit of heat, so I used flakes instead of a seeded dry chile...although next time I might experiment with a varietal such as cascabel)

2 parts each coriander seed, dill seed, yellow -- I s'pose you could try brown -- mustard seed.

Put all in a spice mill and whiz 3-4 pulses...you want a pretty good crack, but not a homogeneous powder. I like mine a TINY bit finer than spice rubs straight out of the tin...in my opinion you get better adhesion that way.

Oh, and note the lack of salt. I like salting the meat first, letting the juices flow back and forth in an osmosis ballet and then adding the spices.

What I did is get a big ol' segment of cow (pretty cheap per pound at the warehouse-type places) and then slice myself. But before doing that, I let it wet-age. If you get the beef -- do not try this with pork, AMHIK -- you can age it in the original cry-o-vac if it has not lost its seal. I've let mine go 16 weeks and the results are spectacular. The taste isn't as minerally/gamy as with dry-aged beef, but it is equally tender.

Now.

What you do with your steak is salt it first as it comes up to room temperature. You will see some "perspiration" on the surface and then you sprinkle your spice rub. Then go light your charcoal fire. (Or wait 30 minutes if your BBQ grill is a gas model.) For max foodieness, I used real hardwood charcoal, but you use whatever. I also use one of those "chimney starters" so that I don't need to worry about (yuck) lighter fluid. When the coals glow, you dump 'em into the BBQ grill.

You drop the charcoal WAY to one side of the vessel. Pile it as far and high on ONE side as possible. This is key.

When the "coal side" is intolerably hot, you put your steaks on the grate. You could, if you are insufferable like I am, give them that quarter-turn for fancy-pants grill marks. The idea is to sear the outside, HARD. You want as much stuff caramelizing there as possible. This is also key. Do not peek, do not flip, etc. Let it go there. 1 minute per inch of thickness per side. So, a 2" thick steak would go 2 minutes per side. Then you slide them to the part of the grill where the coals are NOT. You want the steak to cook to your desired doneness as slowly as possible. The slower you go, the more time certain tenderizing enzymes have to do their voodoo. This is key.

Finally, take them off and cover LOOSELY with foil, let them rest 10-15 or so, so the juices -- which are trying to exit as a result of the heat, much like water exits a boiling pot -- have time to calm down and go back into the steak where they should be.

There.

-J.

* That's 110gm for the metric kids.

'cause Karen asked, and she's the boss of me

2009-08-13T12:41:00.004-04:00

Instructions: Look at the list and put an 'x' after those you have read.

---------

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen- x (Meh.)
2 The Lord of the Rings- x
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte- x (Meh.)
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling- x
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee- x (Required reading. Hated it.)
6 The Bible-x
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte-
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell- x
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman- (What are you people, mental?)
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens- x (Overrated Expectations)
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott- x (Didn't hate it, but seriously disliked it.)
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy- (Hated the film.)
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller-x (Meh.)
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare- (It's the COMPLETE part that wrecks it for me)
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier- (The movie was pretty good.)
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien-
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk-
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger- x (Required reading. Meh.)
19 The Time Traveler’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger-
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot-
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell- (I don't have fallopian tubes)
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald- x (Not awful)
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens-
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy-
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams- X (VERY highly encouraged!)
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky-
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck- x (HATED it.)
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll- X (VERRRRRRY highly encouraged.)
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame-x (my fave bedtime story stuff w. my boys)
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy-
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens- x (Required reading. Hated it.)
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis-x
34 Emma - Jane Austen-x (Meh.)
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis- x
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini-
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres-
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden-
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne-x
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell- x
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown- (The great Stephen Fry, himself no fan of Christianity, called this book "loose stool water...arse gravy of the worst sort.")
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez- x (In Spanish. Meh.)
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving -
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins-
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery-
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy-
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood-
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding- x (Required reading. Hated it.)
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan- Didn't he play Obi Wan Kenobi?
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel-
52 Dune - Frank Herbert-
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons- (Movie was good, though.)
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen- x (Required reading. Meh.)
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth-
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon-
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens- x (Meh.)
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley- x (Required reading. Meh.)
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night - Mark Haddon-
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez-
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck- x (Required reading. Hated it.)
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov- (Required reading. Hated it.)
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt -
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold- x (Was suggested by friends. Hated it with a passion.)
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas- x (Great boyhood stuff.)
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac- x (Required reading. Hated it.)
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy- (Not obscure enough)
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding-
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie-
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville- x (Required reading. Hated it.)
71 Oliver Twist- Charles Dickens- x (Required reading. Okay.)
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker- x (Meh.)
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett-
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson-
75 Ulysses - James Joyce- x (Required reading. REALLLY hated it.)
76 The Inferno – Dante -x (Meh. But I liked the Gustav Dore' illustrations.)
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome-
78 Germinal - Emile Zola-
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray-
80 Possession - AS Byatt-
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens- x (Not too bad.)
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell- (No, not the comedian from Peep Show or Mitchell & Webb)
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker-
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro-
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert-
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry-
87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White- x (Meh.)
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven- Mitch Albom-
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle- x (VERY highly encouraged.)
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton-
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad- x (Required reading. Hated it.)
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery- (Who knew that Exupery was a saint?)
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks-
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams-
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole- x (The most overrated book. Ever.)
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute-
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas- x (More great boyhood stuff.)
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare- x (Even sat through Branagh's 87 hour film version.)
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory- x (I like Roald Dahl.)
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo-x (Required reading. Hated it.)

total= 43, I think. Pretty good for a Finance major, but let the record show most of those I was compelled to read. Most of those, of course, I hated.

BOOKS I HAVE READ THAT SHOULD BE ON THE LIST: Any list that includes To Kill A Mockingboid and Gone With The Wind but no P.G. Wodehouse (and no Mark Twain and no W.S. Gilbert and no John Welter) can only have been compiled by a lady. I am mindful of Wm. F. Buckley's comment when asked to contribute to an article on the "100 Greatest Books" to which he replied: "P.G. Wodehouse wrote 92 books, so the question really is 'What are those other 8 books?'"

Night of the Avenging Blowfish - John Welter
Leave it to Psmith - P.G. Wodehouse
Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court - Mark Twain
Westward, HA! - S.J. Perelman
The Code of the Woosters - P.G. Wodehouse
The Right Stuff - Tom Wolfe
Don Quijote - Miguel de Cervantes (What's with the "X"?)
Adventures of Tom Sawyer - Mark Twain
Adventures of Huckleberry Finn - Mark Twain

So there.

Oh, happy day!

2009-07-31T09:40:00.002-04:00

Happy Feast Day of St. Ignatius of Loyola.

For those nearby-ish, there will be a Mass in honor of St. Ignatius at Gesu today, in downtown Miami at 7pm. It can be safely said that Mass, as said by Fr. Eduardo Alvarez, SJ and the rest of the Jesuits at Gesu, is Joe-approved as it tends to skew towards the traditional end of the liturgical spectrum.

When Karen finally attends Mass there she will go catatonic with joy; it being, in her words, "Mass that resembles a Mass, in a Church that looks like a Church."

AMDG,

-J.

P.S. Parking is available in the lot adjacent to the Rectory on 118 NE 2nd Street and across the street from the Church on 2nd Street.

Equal time for the Anglican kids.

2009-07-23T15:41:00.002-04:00

http://standfirminfaith.com/index.php/site/article/22956/

AMDG,

-J.

Who's behind it all.

2009-07-22T13:45:00.001-04:00

From Fordham

2009-07-09T16:24:00.002-04:00

http://fordhamfrc.org/jpii/pagetwo.htm

AMDG,

-J.

P.S. Bilocatin' over at SWC.

Today, pt 2.

2009-06-11T22:45:00.001-04:00

Today was an astonishing debacle. A nighmare of epic proportions. PLEASE keep me in your prayers.

(Yes, combox off, again.)

AMDG,

-J.

today

2009-06-11T09:08:00.000-04:00

Important day today, businesswise. Prayers -- ideally scrunchy-faced ones -- are humbly requested.

(yes, combox off)

AMDG,

-J.

Prayers...remember those?

2009-06-04T11:47:00.002-04:00

This is getting worse, not better. So please double up on the prayerness.

AMDG,

-J.

Don't think...

2009-06-01T21:22:00.002-04:00

...I no longer need industrial-sized prayers.

'Cause I do.

I especially request prayers for my dad, as his Alzheimer's AND Parkinson's have been acting up of late.

Thanks.

-J.

More along these same lines

2009-05-21T09:17:00.005-04:00

From today's ~~Ascension Thursday~~ 6th Thursday of Easter Gospel reading (St. John 16:16-20, for those playing at home):

"Amen, amen I say to you, that you shall lament and weep, but the world shall rejoice; and you shall be made sorrowful, but your sorrow shall be turned into joy."

The way I see it, unless we have the sorrow to turn to joy, we won't get the joy. Much like the miracle at the wedding feast in Cana, unless there is some standing water around, we won't have the finest wine.

That makes the sorrow not only bearable, but purposeful.

But it's still awful to endure.

AMDG,

-J.

...and I'll say it until I'm blue in the face.

2009-05-19T10:27:00.003-04:00

Unless we recover the zeal and the spirit of the first century Christians—unless we are willing to do what they did and to pay the price that they paid, the future of our country, the days of America, are numbered.

— Fr. John A. Hardon, SJ

Ooops?

2009-05-19T10:09:00.004-04:00

Help me out.

As I was assembling a beverage with suitably palliative properties with which to endure this year's Notre Dame commencement, I seem to have missed the "dialogue" part.

Can anyone point out where, online, I might find it?

-J.

The voice of reason?

2009-05-18T21:17:00.004-04:00

This from today's WSJ. My emphases.

-J.

Irreconcilable Differences?
President Obama delivered his much-anticipated Notre Dame commencement address yesterday, an event that had occasioned much controversy in Roman Catholic circles because of the university's decision to honor the president with an honorary degree despite his pro-abortion views. Obama discussed abortion during the speech, and as one who is decidedly in the middle on this subject (see this 1999 article for a fuller exposition of our views), we were impressed as we listened.

Yet later, thinking about the substance of what he said, we began to wonder if we'd been had. Consider this anecdote

As I considered the controversy surrounding my visit here, I was reminded of an encounter I had during my Senate campaign, one that I describe in a book I wrote called "The Audacity of Hope." A few days after I won the Democratic nomination, I received an e-mail from a doctor who told me that while he voted for me in the Illinois primary, he had a serious concern that might prevent him from voting for me in the general election. He described himself as a Christian who was strongly pro-life--but that was not what was preventing him potentially from voting for me.

What bothered the doctor was an entry that my campaign staff had posted on my Web site--an entry that said I would fight "right-wing ideologues who want to take away a woman's right to choose." The doctor said he had assumed I was a reasonable person, he supported my policy initiatives to help the poor and to lift up our educational system, but that if I truly believed that every pro-life individual was simply an ideologue who wanted to inflict suffering on women, then I was not very reasonable. He wrote, "I do not ask at this point that you oppose abortion, only that you speak about this issue in fair-minded words." Fair-minded words.

After I read the doctor's letter, I wrote back to him and I thanked him. And I didn't change my underlying position, but I did tell my staff to change the words on my Web site.

What does this amount to, really? After winning the Democratic primary, Obama toned down his campaign's truculent rhetoric. That is, his primary campaign appealed to hard-core ideologues, while his general-election campaign made a softer pitch, aimed at attracting moderate and nonideological voters. Obama's rhetorical skill is such that he makes this like an act of depth and thoughtfulness. In fact, it is the most pedestrian of campaign tactics.

The president continued:

And I said a prayer that night that I might extend the same presumption of good faith to others that the doctor had extended to me. Because when we do that--when we open up our hearts and our minds to those who may not think precisely like we do or believe precisely what we believe--that's when we discover at least the possibility of common ground.

That's when we begin to say, "Maybe we won't agree on abortion, but we can still agree that this heart-wrenching decision for any woman is not made casually, it has both moral and spiritual dimensions."

So let us work together to reduce the number of women seeking abortions, let's reduce unintended pregnancies. Let's make adoption more available. Let's provide care and support for women who do carry their children to term. Let's honor the conscience of those who disagree with abortion, and draft a sensible conscience clause, and make sure that all of our health care policies are grounded not only in sound science, but also in clear ethics, as well as respect for the equality of women." Those are things we can do.

Now, understand--understand, Class of 2009, I do not suggest that the debate surrounding abortion can or should go away. Because no matter how much we may want to fudge it--indeed, while we know that the views of most Americans on the subject are complex and even contradictory--the fact is that at some level, the views of the two camps are irreconcilable. Each side will continue to make its case to the public with passion and conviction. But surely we can do so without reducing those with differing views to caricature.

There is a tension between Obama's acknowledgment "that the views of most Americans on the subject are complex and even contradictory" and his statement that "the views of the two camps are irreconcilable." To be sure, he qualifies the latter with weasel words: "at some level." And it true but trivial that it makes no logical sense to assert (to take one formulation of the extreme views) that abortion is both tantamount to murder and of no more moral significance than excising a cyst.

But most people's moral intuitions lead them away from these extremes, and along the spectrum between them there are many ways of reconciling the competing moral claims of both sides. One may take the view that abortion is a gray area, neither murder nor mere "medical procedure." One may see it as a necessary evil, or as a morally ambiguous action that should be avoided, or legally restricted, in case the antiabortion side is right.

Political compromise is the way in which democratic governance produces policies to approximate such wide-ranging views. But the Supreme Court, in Roe v. Wade and subsequent decisions, has severely restricted the space available for political compromise. Obama's position--that Roe should remain the law of the land--is one of irreconciliation.

Many surveys suggest that a majority of Americans, while eschewing both extremes, favor greater restrictions on abortion than Roe now permits. Obama may "respect" those who hold such views, but he thinks that their views should continue to be excluded from the political process. His rhetoric of respect and reconciliation is welcome and reassuring. If only it were true.

How I got through The One's speech.

2009-05-18T01:15:00.004-04:00

I did so the most painless way I knew how, with a Mai Tai...and, for the visual learners in the gallery, here it is in a photo-essay format. Because I am awesome like that.

Okay.

Here is the road company of ingredients: (back to front, left to right)

Rock candy syrup

Orgeat

Steel half of the Boston shaker

Rum (today's star is Barceló Añejo)

Cointreau

Glass half of Boston shaker, with a clip-on strainer (OXO, which is not only the very best, it's also stupidly cheap)

Lime, atop the lime squeezer (were I to be making a bucket of this, instead of one, I'd use the electric juicer, otherwise, I'd wind up with forearms like Popeye)

We start by crushing ice. The first batch of which goes into the glass.

(This glass? Souvenir from The Polynesian Resort in Disney World...which I then found out is available online for 75% less than WDW charges innocent tourists. The ice crusher was an eBay steal. A STEAL, I tell you.)

For added cold-related excellentness, I put it in the freezer, on standby.

And we start building our beverage.

Start with 2 oz. of rum

½ oz. of Cointreau

½ oz. of "rock candy" syrup (which is nothing more than simple sugar syrup, infused with vanilla)

½ oz. of orgeat, which you can buy or (if you're fanatical like I am) make your own

1 oz of lime juice.

Not only do I slice the lime in half, but I also score each half pretty deeply into quadrants. To get maximum juicefulness.

To be safe, I stick the juicer into the steel part of the shaker, lest I spray everything within a 10' (3m) radius with lime juice, especially my eyes.

...and here we have the post-squeezery phase.

Believe me there was an ounce of juice (and a tiny bit over) to be had from that small lime.

Drop the spent lime shells into the glass half of the shaker. Fill the steel half with crushed ice.

Assemble the shaker. When you do this make sure you squeeze the steel half ever-so-slightly and that you push and twist the glass half. This creates a seal. Important if you don't want to become a Mai-Tai sprinkler system, scattering syrupyness all over the place.

Shake until you have a good frost -- not merely condensation -- on the outside of the steel half, then another 5 seconds. For those of you in arid climes, figure 30-45 seconds, total.

Retrieve your vessel from the recesses of the freezer, and pour through the strainer. It is very important you pour into fresh "dry" ice -- not dry ice, mind you.

Garnish with the spent lime shell (or mint, or some cherries, pineapple chunk, orange slice, etc.) and you may then hear, with all equanimity, The President speak.

-J.

RIP

2009-05-03T14:40:00.002-04:00

Jack Kemp, one of my heroes, passed away yesterday.

Please breathe a quick prayer for the repose of his soul and the consolation of his family.

AMDG,

-J.

In other news

2009-04-24T10:10:00.003-04:00

Last night was Confirmation* at our parish.

The Sacrament was administered** by H.E. Lawrence J. Burke, SJ, Archbishop Emeritus of Kingston, Jamaica.

To be utterly frank, I had never heard Word One about him, so I had no idea what to think. Going by what I experienced last night, I am both moved and impressed. More on that in a subsequent post, but suffice it to say that, absent any late breaking news, Abp. Burke will be getting the highly coveted Action Jesuit® designation. Not as snappy as a Cardinal's red hat, but a fine consolation prize.

At any rate, one of the things Abp. Burke revealed in his stellar homily -- wherein he strenuously exhorted the youngsters to always think and feel with the Church -- was that he had developed colon cancer*** and it had metastasized to his liver and lungs.

So, basically, this post's purpose is to ask you to pray for his recovery.

Pray for it right now, s'il vous plait. And keep him in your prayers.

AMDG,

-J.

* One of them, anyway. There are usually too many kids, so it's broken into two, sometimes three, groups.

** He endeared himself to me by issuing the nearly-forgotten "mild slap on the cheek" to the confirmandi.

*** "The prognosis is not good...and because of the chemotherapy, I have lost all my hair and I might need Velcro to keep my miter on."

This is why.

2009-04-22T10:30:00.004-04:00

The diligent reader will note I have a deep and abiding affection for the Society of Jesus.

Sometimes the things some Jesuits (jointly or severally) say/do/write cause me pain, and few souls get shot out of Purgatory. So it's all good.

Naturally, it's the Big Deal Jesuits who make headlines, usually in ways those in Purgatory look upon as a ticket out through my good offices in offering-it-upness. The president of the Important Jesuit University schedules "Polygamy Appreciation Day" or some theologian says Christ was in all probability some species of garden gnome and, oh, by the way, He wants the gutters of Wall Street to run red with the blood of the capitalist classes or a famous Jesuit writer opines that due to a likely typo, all mammals should be ordained.

That sort of stuff.

But the guys who do the real heavy lifting, the guys who sweat out the fate of the souls placed under their care, daily, get no notice. The guys who teach, and inspire, and preach and bring people to Christ get no airplay. They toil under the twin obstacles of a secular society that actively disdains all the Church teaches and a reputation that has been tarnished by the sorts of examples alluded above.

But they deserve our notice and our prayers. I'll give you a fresh example why.

As you should know by now, my oldest started his first year at a Jesuit school, my alma mater. (Whether what I am about to state is still commonplace in Jesuitland or an aberration, I know not.)

The first thing the incoming students are assigned, even before seats and lockers is a Spiritual Director "who is a Jesuit responsible for accompanying him in the development of his spiritual life. Cura Personalis is an aspect of Jesuit Education that refers to personal care and concern for each student."

The Spiritual Director takes this assignment VERY seriously. Which is good, because souls are serious things.

Every student is scheduled to meet with his SD 2-3 sessions a month. Usually 15-30 minutes, and a longer one (+/- 45 minutes) every couple of months. What went on at my son's latest session?

1- He was encouraged to offer up prayers and acts of reparation.
2- He was encouraged to pray for the Holy Father's intentions. (He came home with "papers" from the Apostleship of Prayer!)
3- He was encouraged to pray the Rosary and to find a Devotion. (Father suggested "The Miraculous Virgin Mary.")
4- He was asked to find a friend who doesn't go to Mass every Sunday or doesn't go to Confession regularly and ask him to go. ("You want to see your friends in Heaven, right?")
5- Father heard his Confession.

THAT is why I love them, and woe betide whosoever tries to besmirch them from within and without.

AMDG,

-J.

...and it was on the BBC!

2009-04-14T09:46:00.003-04:00

An excellent documentary on the Shroud of Turin from a surprising source AND in high-def. (I only posted Pt. 1 of 6, but I know you can be counted upon to click the rest.)

This complements a pretty good one from The History Channel -- I know! -- of about 10 years ago.

Go.

-J.

He is not here. He has risen.

2009-04-12T00:24:00.000-04:00

St. Matthew 28:5-8 And the angel answering, said to the women: Fear not you; for I know that you seek Jesus who was crucified. He is not here, for He is risen, as He said. Come, and see the place where the Lord was laid. And going quickly, tell ye His disciples that He is risen: and behold He will go before you into Galilee; there you shall see Him.

Good Friday 2009

2009-04-10T11:17:00.005-04:00

From the Baltimore Catechism...all emphasis mine, etc.:

Lesson the 8th.

ON OUR LORD'S PASSION, DEATH, RESURRECTION, AND ASCENSION

The Passion, that is, the terrible sufferings of Our Lord, began after the Last Supper, and ended at His death. On Thursday evening, Our Lord sat down for the last time with His dear Apostles. He had been talking, eating, and living with them for over three years; and now He is going to take His last meal with them before His death. He told them then how He was to suffer, and that one of them was going to betray Him. They were very much troubled, for only Judas himself knew what he was about to do.

78 - What did Jesus Christ suffer?
Jesus Christ suffered a bloody sweat, a cruel scourging, was crowned with thorns, and was crucified.

After the Supper, Our Lord went with His Apostles to a little country place just outside Jerusalem, and separated from it by a small stream. He told the three Apostles, Peter, James, and John, to stay near the entrance, and to watch and pray, while He Himself went further into the Garden of Olives, or Gethsemane, as this place was called, and throwing Himself upon His face, prayed long and earnestly, but the Apostles fell asleep.

We often find persons who are in great anguish or dread covered with a cold perspiration. Now, Our Lord's agony in the garden was so intense that great drops, not of sweat, but of blood, oozed from every pore, and trickled to the ground. There are three reasons given for this dreadful
agony.

(1) The clear, certain knowledge of the sufferings so soon to be endured. If we were to be put to death tomorrow and knew exactly the manner of our death and the pain it would inflict, how great would be our fear! Our Lord, knowing all things, knew in every particular what He
would have to undergo. Moreover, His sufferings were greater than ours could be, even if we suffered the same kind of death; because His body was most perfect, and therefore more susceptible of pain than ours. A wound in the eye, because the most sensitive and delicate part of the body, would cause us greater pain than a wound on the foot or hand. Thus, all the parts of Our Lord's body being so perfect and sensitive, we can scarcely imagine His dreadful torments, the very thought of which caused Him such agony.

(2) The sins, past, present, and future of all men. He knew all things, as we have said, and looking back upon the world He saw all the sins committed, of thought, word, and deed, from the time of Adam down to His own; and seeing all these offenses against His Father, He was very much
grieved.

(3) The third reason why He grieved. He looked forward and saw how [few people] would profit by all the sufferings He was about to endure. He saw all the sins that would be committed from the time of His death down to the end of the world. He saw us also sinning with the rest. No wonder then that He suffered so much in the garden. This suffering on that night is called "Our Lord's Agony in the Garden." That night Judas, who had betrayed Him to His enemies, came with a great band of soldiers and people, with swords and clubs, to make Our Lord a prisoner. He did not try to escape, but stood waiting for them, though all His Apostles, who had promised to stay with Him, ran away. Then the soldiers led Our Lord to the house of the Chief Priest. Then they gathered the priests, and gave Him a kind of trial, and said He was guilty of death. But at that time the Jews had no power to put persons to death according to the law; so they had to send Our Lord to Pontius Pilate, the Roman Governor, to be condemned, because they were under the power of the Romans. The [Jewish authorities] acted against their laws in the trial of Our Lord.

(a) They tried Him at night; and
(b) they allowed Him no witnesses in His defense, but even employed false witnesses to testify against Him, and thus acted against all law and justice. Early in the morning they led Him to Pilate, who commanded that He should be scourged. Then they stripped Our Lord of His garments, fastened His hands to a low stone pillar, and there He was "scourged" by the Roman soldiers. The lashes used by the Romans were made of leather, with pieces of bone, iron, or
steel fastened into it, so that every stroke would lay open the flesh. It is most likely these were the lashes used upon Our Lord till every portion of His body was bruised and bleeding, and they replaced His garments upon Him. Now, you know if you put a cloth upon a fresh wound
the blood will soak into it and cause it to adhere to the mangled flesh.

Our Blessed Lord's garment, thus saturated with His blood, adhered to His wounded body, and when again removed caused Him unspeakable pain.

Next, the soldiers, because Our Lord had said He was a king--meaning a spiritual king--led Him into a large hall and mocked Him. They made a crown of long, sharp thorns, and forced it down upon His brow with a heavy rod or reed; every stroke driving the thorns into His head, and
causing the blood to roll down His sacred face. They again took off His garments, and opened anew the painful wounds. Because kings wore purple, they put an old purple garment upon Him, and made Him a mock king, genuflecting in ridicule as they passed before Him. They struck Him in the face and spat upon Him; and yet it seems our patient Lord said not a word in complaint. Then they put His garments upon Him, and Pilate asked the people what he should do with Him, and they cried, "Crucify Him." It was then Friday morning, and probably about ten or eleven o'clock. They made a cross of heavy beams, and laying it upon His shoulders, forced Him to carry it to Calvary--the place of execution, just outside the city; for it was not allowed to execute anyone in the city. Our Lord had not eaten anything from Thursday evening, and then with all He suffered and the loss of blood, He must have been very weak at eleven o'clock on Friday morning. He was weak, and fell many times under the Cross. His suffering was increased by seeing His Blessed Mother looking at Him.

When He arrived at Calvary they tore off His garments and nailed Him to the Cross, driving the rough nails through His hands and feet. It was then about twelve o'clock. From twelve to three in the afternoon Our Blessed Saviour was hanging on the Cross, with a great multitude of His
enemies about Him mocking and saying cruel things. Even the two thieves that were crucified with Him reviled Him, though one of them repented and was pardoned before death. Our Lord's poor Mother and His few friends stood at a little distance witnessing all that was going on.
When Our Lord was thirsty His executioners gave Him gall to drink. At three o'clock He died, and there was an earthquake and darkness, and the people were sorely afraid.

But you will ask, how could these soldiers be so cruel? They were Romans; and in those days men called gladiators used to fight with swords before the Roman Emperor and all the people--just as actors play now for the amusement of their audience. People who could enjoy such scenes as men slaying one another in deadly conflict would scarcely be moved to pity by seeing a man scourged. Again, in the early ages of the Church, during the persecutions, the Emperors used to order the Christians to be thrown to wild beasts to be torn to pieces in the
presence of the people--who applauded these horrible sights. They who could see so many put to death would not mind putting one to death, even in the most terrible manner.

79 - On what day did Christ die?
Christ died on Good Friday.

"Good Friday," so called since that time.

80 - Why do you call that day "good" on which Christ suffered so sorrowful a death?
We call that day good on which Christ died, because by His death He showed His great love for man, and purchased for him every blessing.

81 - Where did Christ die?
Christ died on Mount Calvary.

"Mount Calvary," a little hill just outside the city of Jerusalem. For every city they have a special prison or place where all their criminals are executed. Now, as the great Temple of God was in Jerusalem, the city itself was called the City of God, because in the Temple God spoke to
the priests in the Holy of Holies. The Temple was divided into two parts: one part, something like the body of our churches, called the Holy, and the other part, where the Ark of the Covenant was kept, called the Holy of Holies. It had about the same relation to the Temple as our altar and sanctuary have to our churches. The Ark of the Covenant was a box about four feet long, two and a half feet high, and two and a half feet wide, made of the finest wood, and ornamented with gold in the most beautiful manner. In it were the tables of stone, on which were written the Commandments of God; also the rod that Aaron--Moses' brother--changed into a serpent before King Pharaoh; also some of the manna with which the people were miraculously fed during their forty years' journey in the desert when they fled out of Egypt.

All these things were figures of the true religion. The Ark itself was a figure of the tabernacle, and the manna of the Holy Eucharist. The Holy of Holies was hidden from the people by a veil. Only the Chief Priest was allowed into that sacred place, and but once a year. The veil--called the veil of the Temple--hiding that Holy of Holies, though the things mentioned above were no longer in it, was torn asunder when Our Lord died on the Cross (Matt. 27:51); because after His death there was no need any longer of figures; for after His death we have the tabernacle itself and the real manna, the real bread from Heaven, viz., the body of Our Lord.

The veil was rent to show also that God would not remain any longer in the Temple, but would be for the future only in the Christian Church. On account of all these things, therefore, Jerusalem was called the Holy City, and no criminals were put to death in it, but were conducted to Calvary--which means the place of skulls--and were there put to death. I now call your attention to one thing. If the Jews showed such great respect and reverence for the Ark containing only figures of the Blessed Sacrament, how should we behave in the presence of the tabernacle on the altar containing the Blessed Sacrament itself!

82 - How did Christ die?
Christ was nailed to a cross and died on it, between two thieves.

"Two thieves," because they thought this would make His death more disgraceful--making Him equal to common criminals. One of these thieves, called the penitent thief, repented of his sins and received Our Lord's pardon before his death. The other thief died in his sins. Holy writers
tell us that one of these thieves was saved to give poor sinners hope, and to teach them that they may save their souls at the very last moment of their lives if only they are heartily sorry for their sins and implore God's pardon for them. The other thief remained and died impenitent, that sinners may fear to put off their conversion to the hour of death, thus rashly presuming on God's mercy. Persons who willfully delay their conversion and put off their repentance to the last moment, living bad lives with the hope of dying well, may not accept the grace to repent at the last moment, but may, like the unfortunate, impenitent thief, die as they lived, in a state of sin.

83 - Why did Christ suffer and die?
Christ suffered and died for our sins.

It was not necessary for Our Lord to suffer so much, but He did it to show how much He loved us and valued our souls, and how much He was willing to give for them. We, alas, do not value our souls as Christ did; we sometimes sell them for the merest trifle--a moment's gratification.

84 - What lessons do we learn from the sufferings and death of Christ?
From the sufferings and death of Christ we learn the great evil of sin, the hatred God bears to it, and the necessity of satisfying for it.

We learn "the great evil of sin" also the misery [sin] brought into the world; the "hatred God bears to it," from the punishment He inflicted on the wicked angels and on our first parents for it; and lastly, the "necessity of satisfying for it," from the fact that God allowed His dear and only Son to suffer death itself for the sins even of others.

85 - Whither did Christ's soul go after His death?
After Christ's death His soul descended into Hell.

86 - Did Christ's soul descend into the Hell of the damned?
The Hell into which Christ's soul descended was not the Hell of the damned, but a place or state of rest called Limbo, where the souls of the just were waiting for Him.

Hell had many meanings in olden times. The grave was sometimes called Hell. Jacob, when he heard that wild beasts had devoured his son Joseph, said: "I will go down with sorrow into Hell." He meant the grave. Limbo is not the same as Purgatory. [Limbo] does not exist now, or, if it does, is only for little children who have never committed actual sin and who have died without Baptism. They will never get into Heaven or see God, but they will not have to suffer pains as they who are in Purgatory or Hell endure.

87 - Why did Christ descend into Limbo?
Christ descended into Limbo to preach to the souls who were in prison--that is, to announce to them the joyful tidings of their redemption.

88 - Where was Christ's body while His soul was in Limbo?
While Christ's soul was in Limbo His body was in the Holy Sepulchre.

"Sepulchre" is the same as tomb. It is like a little room. In it the coffin is not covered up with earth as it is in the grave, but is placed upon a stand. We call such places vaults, and you can see many of them in any cemetery or burying ground. Sometimes they are cut in the side of elevated ground with their entrance level with the road, and sometimes they are built altogether under the ground. The one in which Our Lord was placed was cut out of the side of a rock, and had for a door a great stone against the entrance. Our Lord was not placed in a coffin, but was wrapped in a linen cloth. It was the custom of the Jewish people and of many other ancient nations to embalm the bodies of the dead, wrap them in cloths, and cover them with sweet spices. (Matt. 27:59). Thus it was that Mary Magdalene and other good women came early in the morning to
anoint the body of Our Lord.

But you will say, why did they not do it on Friday evening or night? The reason was this: The day with the Jews began at sunset--generally about six o'clock--and ended at sunset on the next evening. We count our twenty-four hours, or day, from twelve at midnight till twelve the next night. Therefore, with the Jews six o'clock on Friday evening was the beginning of Saturday. They kept Saturday, or the Sabbath, instead of Sunday as a day of worship. On that day, which they kept very strictly, it was not allowable to do work of any kind; so they could not anoint Our Lord's body till the Sabbath ended, which was about six o'clock, or sunset on Saturday evening.

So, as the Holy Scripture tells us, they came very early in the morning; for Mary Magdalene and these good women were Jews, and strictly observed the Jewish law. You must know that Our Lord Himself, the Blessed Virgin, St. Joseph, and the Apostles were Jews.

Unrelated to anything.

2009-03-27T11:40:00.001-04:00

Real racing season is here.

Beautiful plumage

2009-03-26T08:55:00.008-04:00

1 - Lest you forget, prayers are STILL needed.

2- There has been much made of the spectacle of the President being invited to issue the commencement address at, and receive an honorary degree from, Notre Dame. The noble and right-thinking among us have noted this is the most calamitous thing to befall Notre Dame since Jimmy Johnson started trudging up to South Bend in the 80s. It is certainly worse than changing from green to blue jerseys.

If you are of a perverse cast of mind, as I have been portrayed as being, you are actually enjoying the exegetical gyrations undertaken by the Catholics who, for reasons one simply cannot fathom, are enthusiastically* supportive of the President. While most do not get the northward tingle along the femur, these benighted folks are clearly enamored of the President's proposals and policies and must try to reconcile with the fact the President's record falls impressively short of what Catholic teaching insists are the most important ones, i.e., the life issues. Especially when the President's other views, which they unilaterally declare to be "closer in line with Catholic doctrine" tend to be on issues where a wide prudential license is granted.

This, they likely suspect, is a problem.

So the Ouled Nail dances begin. These take on three basic flavors (which may be combined to make all manner of logical deliciousness; I take all these quotes verbatim, incidentally):

1- Tu quoque. For example, saying the body of people opposed to the ~~Teleprompter and his~~ President putting in a stop at Notre Dame is "not only rabidly pro-war, it also publicly defends and endorses torture, a non-negotiable and intrinsically evil act. And then there's Weigel who a few weeks ago was deriding Americans for not ebing[sic] bright enough to see how great Bush's war actually was."

Y'see what he (or she, I'm not in a mood to split hairs) did just there? There was no defense of the decision, or of the President, or even an attempt -- futile as that may be -- to reconcile the President's views with Catholic doctrine. Just something along the lines of "Oh, yeah? You guys are just as bad!"

2- Ad hominem. If the above is a desperate defensive gambit (and it is) then this one is a preemptive strike, along the lines of Pearl Harbor. Some quotes, from ONE post:

"The right wing of the Catholic Church was, as we noted on Saturday, up in arms within a twinkling of the eye over any honor being given to the President. Mr. Hudson is in high dudgeon at his blog, even issuing a veiled threat to Fort Wayne-South Bend Bishop John D’Arcy"

"Someone at the Catholic News Agency, a conservative propaganda outfit that pretends to be an unbiased purveyor of news..."

"This latest contretemps is disturbing not only because some of us are more than tired with the right wing insisting that only they can lay claim to the mantle of Catholicism, that those of us who see the demands of the world, or the challenge of the Gospels, differently are bad Catholics."

"I ran into a priest whom I have known for more than twenty years but whom I had not seen recently. He did not discuss President Obama, he ranted."

"What is it about President Obama that makes the right wing so crazy, so uncharitable, so frothing-at-the-mouth unreasonable?"

"I suspect the problem is that many on the far right listen to each other only"

"This crowd of conservatives does not own the Catholic Church."

"And, we should be thrilled that the right wing commentariat has again adopted its smug 'I thank Thee, Lord, that I am not like other men' stance." (I find the latter especially, deliciously rich.)

So.

If you think it's, y'know, a bad thing for an ostensibly Catholic university to swan about honoring** political figures especially since the USCCB has specifically said this oughtn't be done...well, you're one of THOSE right-wingers, watching Fox News in your undershirt, drinking domestic beer out of a can, hurling racial invective, and foaming freely at the mouth hoping that Notre Dame had chosen to bring in a catherine wheel to use on those who support peace and justice. Got that? (The in-depth version of how to use this tactic effectively can be found here.)

3- "What's the big deal?" Finally we have an excellent example of damning with faint praise. You'll see the issue framed along the lines of:

a) The President has not ever actually performed an abortion.

or

b) The President and those who agree with him on these hot button issues must be engaged in dialogue.

or

c) This doesn't mean Notre Dame agrees with the President on these hot button issues.

To which I say...
a) So what? By his actions he has made/will make it possible for more people to perform abortions. Keep in mind Bernie Madoff never actually held anyone up.
b) I will believe this when Fr. Jenkins stands up in the middle of the speech saying "Point of personal privilege, Mr. President..." and then engages the President in a dialogue.
c) The problem is that Notre Dame's administration is minimizing the importance of these issues. It is saying, basically, that disagreements over these issues are no big thing. Which, since someone took quill to parchment and jotted down the Didache...they are.

One wonders what the reaction would have been had Notre Dame chosen to honor, say, Bp. Williamson.

Argh.

-J.

P.S. Uncle Di does a masterful job of looking at the man behind the curtain.

* They remind me of Monty Python's "dead parrot sketch" wherein the pet shop owner waxes eloquent about the Norwegian Blue parrot and its manifold glories ("Beautiful plumage, sir.") conveniently glossing over the customer's complaint that for all the wonders of the Norwegian blue, this one happens to be dead. "He's passed on. This parrot is no more. He has ceased to be. He's expired and gone to meet his maker. He's a stiff. Bereft of life, he rests in peace. If you hadn't have nailed him to the perch he'd be pushing up the daisies. He's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot!"

** I suspect most people could have grumblingly accepted the commencement address, but it's the honorary degree that sticks in their craw...which you'll note is not something mentioned by those denizens of the Amen Corner, preferring to paint it as just a speech issue. Odd, that.

Deja vu, all over again.

2009-03-02T11:23:00.003-05:00

First: We're still in serious need of prayers.

Second: Look at this from Fr. Z's blog. Fr. Z wisely closed off comments, before things became unruly.

You may also recall this on this issue from a couple of years back.

AMDG,

-J.

Still.

2009-02-18T09:15:00.002-05:00

Still here, still in serious need of prayers.

AMDG,

-J.

Wait. There's more.

2009-02-11T12:43:00.003-05:00

On top of all the OTHER stuff for which I am in serious need of prayer, my son's autism school -- which has been a marvel and a Godsend) is in danger of closing due to the lousy economy.

So, while you're at it, please put this in along with the rest of the prayers on my behalf. My gratitude to you will be permanent, manifest and complete.

AMDG,

-J.

Our Lady of Lourdes!

2009-02-11T09:47:00.002-05:00

It's her feast day.

Ora pro nobis.

-J.

P.S. Things are still looking VERY serious (see post below) so please spare a brief prayer for us.

Yeah, STILL.

2009-02-04T22:47:00.002-05:00

Things are STILL in serious need of your prayers.

In fact, please mention this in your blogs (if, in fact, you have a blog) and have THEM pass it along.

Frankly, I need as many people praying this up as is possible.

Thanks.

-J.

The repudiatin' blues.

2009-01-28T17:07:00.004-05:00

In light of how President Obama has overturned the Bush Administration's Mexico City policy, Action Dominican® Fr. Philip N. Powell, OP has asked us to publicly repudiate this action, lest you be implicated with abortion:

If you oppose "abortion rights," then repudiating this action publicly ensures that you are not materially cooperative in this man's mortal sin. If you voted for him knowing that he is an abortion supporter, then now's your chance to repent.

Do it!

AMDG,

-J.

Prayer requests, now with an added dose of urgency!

2009-01-26T10:47:00.004-05:00

I'm at it again. But now it's gotten REALLY serious.

1- I remain inexpressively grateful for all the prayers and Masses on my behalf. You are all in my prayers.

2- As you may remember, the current economic mess pretty much has me straight in the crosshairs. Ground zero, if you will.

(My prayer life, though, is a LOT stronger, and I pray that my heart will be as filled and eager to come to God in praise and thanksgiving as it is to come filled with petition and supplication.)

Since, unfortunately, my business has developed, over the last few years, a greater and greater exposure to commercial real estate in southwest Florida things are looking pretty grim.

We have three major projects out there and if only ONE of those were to come through we should be able to get through this year. I'm not looking for untold wealth, I just want to be able to meet my obligations to my clients and pay my bills and feed my family, pay for all the schooling and care my kids need (especially my youngest with autism) and take care of my dad with Parkinson's and Alzheimer's.

Last time I said things were not yet dire, but it was getting closer.

Well. It got closer a WHOLE LOT faster than anticipated. The client on whom we counted to for the bulk of our income "until things straightened out" just filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection.

Effectively, our cash flow has stopped and will not resume for an expected 3 months.

There are, praise God, some opportunities for us to get out from the very severe financial stress we are facing. There is a glimmer of hope and we cling prayerfully to that hope.

3- Therefore I am asking, as humbly as I can, for your prayers that we may be delivered from the severe financial stress under which we find ourselves. If you can manage to get "scrunchy-faced" that would be appreciated, and some pious perspiration might not be out of place. If any of the priests reading this would say a Mass (yet again) for these intentions, that -- as the highest form of prayer we have -- would be even better.

4- I am confidently and prayerfully placing these matters in the hands of Our Lord, through the intercession of Our Lady, His Immaculate Mother, Mary. Pray I may receive His guidance on how to proceed and His providence in doing so.

5- I am not someone given to stress easily, or worry, or fear. But this is different. As a husband and father, being unable to provide for my family is a searing emotional and spiritual trial.

I will never -- at least not this side of Heaven -- be able to adequately express my gratitude to all of you for what you have done and are doing on my/our behalf. Please know said gratitude, however imperfectly expressed, is thorough and complete.

Confidently in Christ, through Mary,

-J.

St. Philomena

2009-01-22T15:05:00.004-05:00

I wasn't really up to speed with St. Philomena. I was always on the "is-she-or-isn't-she" rollercoaster.

In the last couple of days, I have had reason to believe "she is" and therefore, she deserves to have "greater airplay." To start, here is something on her.

2009-01-22T12:14:00.007-05:00

Update! Fr. Martin Fox shares his impressions on the March For Life.

The following prayer from Priests for Life is prayed because the U.S. Catholic Bishops set aside January 22, as a special day of prayer and penance for the holocaust.

God and Father of Life,
You have created every human person,
and have opened the way for each to have eternal life.
We live in the shadow of death.
Tens of millions of your children have been killed
thanks to the Roe vs. Wade decision legalizing abortion.
Father, have mercy on us.
Heal our land
and accept our offering of prayer and penance.
In Your love for us,
turn back the scourge of abortion.
May each of us exult in hearts full of hope,
and hands full of mercy,
and work together to build a culture of life.
We pray through Christ our Lord.
Amen.

Our Lady of Sorrows, ora pro nobis.

AMDG,

-J.

Regularly scheduled prayer request, Pt. 2

2009-01-20T07:15:00.003-05:00

Yes, I still realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllly need prayers for this.

There are some reasons to be hopeful, but also some reasons to be very, very concerned.

Please.

AMDG,

-J.

P.S. You are all in my prayers.

Travelin', Jesuit-style

2009-01-17T20:46:00.001-05:00

Planning your summer vacation already?

Consider this.

AMDG,

-J.

Please lend 'em a hand.

2009-01-16T09:15:00.004-05:00

This is from Wendy Cukierski (from the VERY AWESOME Cukierski Family Apostolate). They have been great to me, and more importantly personally kind and prayerful. Please read, and give them some help.

For those of you who are still employed, I beg of you, if you can help and you wish to get the most Spiritual Food for your dollar, kindly consider helping us clear up 2008 apostolate bills. http://www.cukierski.net/donations.shtml

(UPDATE: I know that folks probably think because we get so many visits, that we get lots of donations. The fact of the matter is that we get very, very, very few. In fact, we are lucky to get a couple a month! We have been supporting the bulk of the apostolate and the pro-life and evangelizing programs by ourselves for all these years. Like Mother Teresa said, to keep the lamp burning..you have to put oil in it. Our apostolate lamps are out of fuel.)

I would like to get this cleared up so we can be here for folks in 2009. To get a breakdown of the costs, go here: http://www.cukierski.net/donations.shtml

Even though we are concerned about making it, we are stepping out in faith and still expanding the website with evangelization and educational video's and tools (wander around and see the changes). We are still mailing out the free sacramentals and running all the free programs at our expense (but we desperately need outside help!).
(UPDATE: I do not want 2009 to be the year that the apostolate ceased to exist! So many times over the past 13 years, I thought "this is it"..."we're going under"...and miraculously, some folks would come through. Hoping and praying for another "save"!)

Please, help us to put "earthly concerns" aside so that we can all get as excited as my 2 year old who exclaimed...."Baby Jesus is coming!"

(UPDATE: I will be sending the biggest helper a special gift. I have a St. Anthony of Padua relic that is very old and very cherished. I also have some other very special Catholic antique items for the biggest helpers. I'm willing to part with these for some help to keep the apostolate going. We simply can't do the bulk of it on our own anymore. I ask not for myself but for THOSE who NEED the apostolate's help!)

SO THERE IT IS...our update :). I'm still HOPEFUL! Not sure if that is my faith talking or perhaps my stupidity :-). LOL

My love and prayers to all of you...
Wendy C. and our 12 (soon to be 13) blessings from God The Cukierski Family Apostolate

(PS...To raise funds, we are offering "Sponsored Pages". We are starting with one of our more popular pages-The St. Therese page: http://www.cukierski.net/sainttherese.shtml It contains everything St. Therese, including a video that is watched often!

There will be One MAIN sponsor who will remain on the top of the page forever. No new fees. $1,500 per page. Will be allowed up to 25 words.

The first person to email us and agree to sponsoring will lock in.

Then there are sub-sponsors which are located throughout the page.

They are allowed up to 7 - 10 words.

Ex: Mr. & Mrs. John Doe in Memory of Jeffrey Doe

Ex: Mr. & Mrs. John Smith in Thanksgiving for favors granted.

Ex: Mr. & Mrs. John Jane in Memory of all the unborn.

These are a $99 one time fee. Will be limited to 15 sub sponsors. Once again, the first 15 people to email us will get locked in.

God bless you and kindly PRAY for our fundraising efforts! :-)

Regularly scheduled prayer request

2009-01-12T14:13:00.001-05:00

(Yes, this. Still.)

1- I am inexpressively grateful for all the prayers and Masses on my behalf. You are all in my prayers.

2- As you may know, the current economic mess pretty much has me straight in the crosshairs. I'm at Ground Zero, if you will.

(The upside is that my prayer life is a LOT stronger, and I pray that my heart will be as filled and eager to come to God in praise and thanksgiving as it is to come to Him filled with petition and supplication.)

Unfortunately my business has developed, over the last few years, a greater and greater exposure to commercial real estate in southwest Florida. We have three major projects out there and if only one (JUST ONE!) of those were to come through we should be able to get through this year. I'm not looking for untold wealth, I just want to be able to meet my obligations and pay my bills and feed my family, pay for all the schooling and care my kids need (especially my youngest with autism) and take care of my dad with Parkinson's and Alzheimer's.

Things are not dire, yet. But it's getting closer.

There are, praise God, some opportunities for us to get out from the very severe financial stress we are facing. Tomorrow I have an appointment that, if it all goes as hoped, would go a long way to allowing us to weather the next year or two. Not wallowing in luxury, of course, but we would be able to meet all our obligations and make everyone whole.

3- So.

I am asking, as humbly as I can, for your prayers that we may be delivered from the severe financial stress under which we find ourselves. If you can manage to get "scrunchy-faced" that would be appreciated, and some pious perspiration might not be out of place. If any of the priests on this list would say a Mass for these intentions, that -- as the highest form of prayer we have -- would be even better.

4- I am confidently placing these matters in the hands of Our Lord, through the intercession of Our Lady, His mother, Mary. Pray I may receive His guidance on how to proceed and His providence in doing so.

I will never -- at least not this side of Heaven -- be able to adequately express my gratitude to all of you for what you have done and are doing on my/our behalf. Please know said gratitude, however imperfectly expressed, is thorough and complete. Your prayerful kindness will not go unremembered.

Confidently in Christ, through Mary,

-J.

Sad news (again!)

2009-01-08T11:15:00.002-05:00

Fr. Neuhaus died about an hour ago.

Requiem aeternam dona ei, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat ei . Requiescat in pace. Amen.

AMDG,

-J.

Warning! Generalization follows!

2009-01-08T09:29:00.003-05:00

Is it just me or are the "young fogey" sort of priest actually funnier and wittier than their more...er...progressive (ahem) brethren?

Discuss.

Uh oh.

2009-01-07T22:42:00.004-05:00

This from Fr. Brian Van Hove, SJ's blog:

"Father George Rutler just administered the last rites of the Church to Father Richard John Neuhaus. All are asked to pray for a holy death for Father Neuhaus."

St. Joseph, patron of a happy death, intercede for Fr. Neuhaus, that his death, seemingly imminent, be a happy one, and his soul be met in a loving embrace by Our Lord.

AMDG,

-J.

At least this is from a new source.

2009-01-07T15:09:00.002-05:00

That's nice.

-J.

Updatedness

2009-01-07T05:42:00.004-05:00

Please.

I'm asking nicely.

As you may know, there are some business things (God knows what they are, I'd rather not get into them here) I have going on. Some are just stalled, and some "ain't lookin' too pretty." Since this post could devolve into a mush of cryptic business-speak I'll cut to the chase:

Basically, I SERIOUSLY need your prayers. I mean really, really need the prayers.

(The hopes I had for this were seriously -- probably fatally -- dashed, which didn't help.)

So, while I work on getting Rosary burns and calluses on my knees, I ask you with every last shred of humility* I have, to please pray for these intentions. Whereas two years ago my hopes would have been for serious financial success, today I'd be thrilled with getting out with only a "severe beating."

Please keep me and my family in your prayers.

AMDG,

-J.

* Humility, er, does not come naturally to me. I expect this is part of what God's doing here.

This t-shirt....

2009-01-06T12:47:00.001-05:00

...says it all.

Whoa.

2009-01-05T15:31:00.003-05:00

Just wrapped up a phone call which brought potentially SPECTACULAR (and very high in relief and consolation, too) business news.

Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please...keep me (and this project--God knows which one it is) in your prayers.

I promise to return the favor.

AMDG,

-J.

Like Bernie Madoff being made Pope

2009-01-05T07:40:00.004-05:00

An excerpt of something over at H&PR, by Fr. Joseph Sirba:

(I could reprint the whole thing in its entirety, because it is ALL brilliant and quite worthy of your attention. But for now this will have to do. As usual, all emphases are mine.)

2) In point of fact, massive Catholic losses have been hidden by the large number of Catholic immigrants coming to the United States in recent years. Of the present 23.9 percent of adults who call themselves Catholic, about 77 percent of that number (or 41,406,750) were born in the United States whereas about 23 percent of that number (or 12,368,250) are immigrants, mostly Hispanic. Here it should be noted that if Catholic immigrants were not replacing native-born Catholics who are leaving the faith, the percentage of the population that identifies itself as Catholic would be lower than it is now, only about 18.4 percent of the population—or less than one in five—rather than the almost one in four Americans who identify themselves as Catholics today. Of further interest here is that among those Catholics seventy and older, 85 percent are white, 12 percent are Latino, 2 percent are “Other/Mixed” and 1 percent are black. However, among those eighteen to twenty-nine, 47 percent are white, 45 percent are Latino, 5 percent are “Other/Mixed” and 3 percent are black, which makes white Catholics a minority (less than 50 percent) among the youngest age group in the survey.
3) Massive losses among native-born Catholics have not only been significant but staggering, so much so that those who conducted the survey wrote in their analysis, “Catholicism has lost more people to other religions or to no religion at all than any other single religious group.” It should be noted that this statement is true both in terms of absolute numbers as well as in terms of percentage of the U.S. population. However, it is not true when figured as a percentage of the Catholic population alone. Figured that way, Catholic losses as a percentage of the Catholic population were 24 percent, behind only Methodists, whose losses stood at 25 percent. By way of comparison, Presbyterian losses were at 21 percent, Baptists were 18 percent, and Lutherans and Episcopalians were each 16 percent. On the other hand, nondenominational Protestants grew a whopping 200 percent, the percentage of unaffiliated grew 120 percent and Pentecostals grew 12 percent.

4) 10.1 percent of the adult population in the United States now consists of people who have left the Catholic Church for another religion or for no religion. To put it another way, one out of every ten people in the United States (or 22,725,000) is an ex-Catholic. It should be noted here that these are not non-practicing Catholics who, when asked about their religion, would identify themselves as Catholic. Rather, these are individuals who were baptized and raised Catholic but who no longer identify themselves as Catholic.

What is extra interesting is where all these +/- 23 million Catholics went. Father wants us to notice teh two largest numbers:

Evangelical Protestant: 6,509,250

*Unaffiliated: 9,780,750

You'll kindly note that Evangelical Protestantism isn't known, exactly, for it's...er...progressivism or fondness for grey areas. In fact, it's most known (and derided, I think) for its certainty in teaching what it teaches. So it's curious, that. (Perhaps the notion put forward by our more, um, Spirit-of-Vatican-2 brethren that people leave due to the Church's unyielding nature on ____ may have some flaws therein.)

But what about the remaining 53-odd million Catholics? (This is where the lovely and gracious Mary Jo gets up and cheers)

Furthermore, of those 53,775,000 American Catholics who remain in the fight, except for the elderly, most are so poorly catechized that they continue to be highly vulnerable to invitations from evangelical congregations or to the secularizing influences in our society.

(Again, I can't emphasize enough how worthwhile the entire article is.)

What's it all mean?

At this point, allow me to repeat that this survey merely quantifies what pastors across the country have been aware of for many years now, namely, that large numbers of individuals who were baptized Catholic have left the Catholic Church. It also reveals that if we exclude the Catholic immigrant population, we are doing far worse at retaining members than even the weakest of the mainline Protestant denominations.

And here are the bits that will have the lovely and gracious Karen hopping up and down and hollering "YES! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" at full lung capacity:

In a word, our problem has been dissent tolerated by weak leaders, which in turn has led to confusion as to what we as Catholics believe and how we should live.

and

[...]our bishops need to do several things. First, make sure that everyone is presenting a clear message. All remaining dissenters must be expunged from their positions within diocesan offices, major parishes and influential positions in the Church. This is especially crucial in Catholic colleges and universities, which form the weakest link in the nascent renewal we are experiencing. For the most part, they are still seriously undermining the faith of our young people

and especially

It’s now far beyond the time for half measures. We must act now to clean up the messes that remain and to develop reasonable, workable plans to move forward. Jesus said, “He who is not with me is against me, and he who does not gather with me scatters” (Matt. 12:30). Tolerating dissent has led us to where we are today. It’s time for some intolerance.

AMDG,

-J.

* Defined as "I definitely believe in God, but that's as far as I got."

2009

2009-01-01T09:48:00.003-05:00

A happy and blessed New Year to all of you.

Oh, and get yourself some plenary indulgence goodness*. Offer expires today! :-)

Here are the details:

On January 1, the faithful can gain a Plenary Indulgence by public recitation or singing of the Veni Creator:

And in our souls take up Thy rest,
Come with Thy grace and Heavenly aid,
And fill the hearts which Thou hast made.
Come, O Creator Spirit blest,
Great Paraclete! To Thee we cry,
O highest gift of God most high!
O fount of life! O fire of love!
And sweet anointing from above.

Thou in Thy sevenfold gifts art known,
The finger of God’s hand we own;
The promise of the Father, Thou!
Who dost the tongue with power endow.

Kindle our senses from above,
And make our hearts o’erflow with love;
With patience firm and virtue high,
The weakness of our flesh supply.

Far from us drive the foe we dread,
And grant us Thy true peace instead;
So shall we not, with Thee for guide,
Turn from the path of life aside.

Oh, may Thy grace on us bestow
The Father and the Son to know,
And Thee through endless times confessed
Of both the Eternal Spirit blest.
All glory while the ages run
Be to the Father and the Son
Who rose from death; the same to Thee,
O Holy Ghost, eternally. Amen.

According to Fr. Z -- under whose biretta groweth no moss -- you must do this in a state of grace, make a Sacramental Confession within 20 days of the above, pray for the Pope’s intentions and have no attachment to sin, even venial sin. It is sufficient to make a sincere act of will to love God and despise all sin. The Pope’s intentions for January 2009 (for today and the Veni Creator) are:

General: That the family may become more and more a place of training and transmission of the faith.
Mission: That the different Christian confessions, aware of the need for a new evangelization in this period of profound transformations, may be committed to announcing the Good News and moving towards the full unity of all Christians in order to offer a more credible testimony of the Gospel.

AMDG,

-J.

* Make sure you read through the combox, for some crucial details.

Oh, yeah.

2008-12-30T12:46:00.004-05:00

Just 'cause I haven't mentioned it in a while, doesn't mean I am no longer in need of your prayers.

Don't you dare quit!

AMDG,

-J.

Worth viewing.

2008-12-30T12:15:00.002-05:00

Here is a series of videos on the Shrine of St. Joseph, in St. Louis, MO (of which Rev. Brian Van Hove, SJ is the Rector)

Yeah, thanks Media

2008-12-29T16:42:00.002-05:00

Seems the media doesn't just whitewash stuff here.

Oy,

-J.

¡Que viva España!

2008-12-28T18:25:00.004-05:00

Check this out from supposedly secular, supposedly Socialist Spain:

http://www.libertaddigital.com/suplementos/albums/reportajes/misaporlafamilia2008/

http://www.larazon.es/noticia/la-familia-cristiana-sin-complejos *

http://www.abc.es/multimedia/fotos/26437.asp

AMDG,

-J.

* This translates as "Christians without any hangups about it." (i.e. "unapologetically Christian.")

God bless us, everyone

2008-12-24T21:21:00.002-05:00

By the time I get back to these august pages it will be Christmas -- or as I say during my more mordant moments, Boxing Eve -- over here.

So I wanted to issue my official Christmas message to the world (WARNING: SENTIMENT TO ENSUE)

2008 was a bit of a tough year. While, yes, work hath given much suck, and my dad's health is declining, this is a navel-gazingish sort of statement, no doubt as most of my people are in good health, we're all together and we've not had to undergo the level of awfulness which have been the fate of other people. No hurricanes, no plagues, and just a bit of sinus trouble.

I have a gorgeous wife who, inexplicably, loves me. I have two (normally) wonderful sons. In most ways I have been blessed well beyond my deserving. I know this. Perhaps you've realized this way your own bad self. It's good to be reminded of this with regularity.

That said, I will be more pleased than not to have 2008 wrap up and leave me alone. I have lost some dear people, some through death and some who turned out different than I had thought and they sublimated out of my life as quietly as they entered it.

But!

I have been blessed with some stellar new pals in addition to the Usual Suspects. I take astonishingly little seriously, but my friendships are among those things I actually take with seriousness. Thank you all.

To all of you who have stuck around here, especially during the rough moments of the World Ending: Thanks. I am speechless -- not an easy feat, this -- with gratitude. You are all in my prayers and, old-school Catholic that I am, y'know there will be candle-lighting at some point.

Of course, being the old school Romish sort I am, you know I can't post something without a mention of Whose Birthday it is. As per Douay-Rheims (Protestant kids, feel free to substitute the KJV):

And he shall grow up as a tender plant before him, and as a root out of a thirsty ground: there is no beauty in him, nor comeliness: and we have seen him, and there was no sightliness, that we should be desirous of him: Despised, and the most abject of men, a man of sorrows, and acquainted with infirmity: and his look was as it were hidden and despised, whereupon we esteemed him not. Surely he hath borne our infirmities and carried our sorrows: and we have thought him as it were a leper, and as one struck by God and afflicted. But he was wounded for our iniquities, he was bruised for our sins: the chastisement of our peace was upon him, and by his stripes we are healed.

All we like sheep have gone astray, every one hath turned aside into his own way: and the Lord hath laid on him the iniquity of us all. He was offered because it was his own will, and he opened not his mouth: he shall be led as a sheep to the slaughter, and shall be dumb as a lamb before his shearer, and he shall not open his mouth.

Let's keep in our thoughts and in our prayers all those whose Christmas will not be merry and bright. People who are estranged from family and friends, people who are suffering anxiety or depression, suffering from emotional or material deprivation, carrying the pains and scars of abuse and neglect. Let's never forget our individual moral obligation to those who need our help and concern. Let's not also forget all the blessings we have received, and let's not forget that chief among these are the love of family and the comfort of friends.

I wish you all the very Merriest of Christmases, spent basking in the warmth of loved ones and reflecting on the good in your life. Enjoy this honest but saccharine post, you shan't see its like for another year.

AMDG,

-J.

P.S. May Santa Claus/Father Christmas deal kindly with you, too.
P.P.S. If you can spare it, breathe a quick prayer for me/us and these convoluted business projects o' mine.

Behind schedule.

2008-12-23T21:48:00.003-05:00

This year, for a number of different reasons -- including some nearly valid ones -- Christmas hath crept upon us as a thief in the night.

This means that a lot of stuff we normally do (i.e. that we do NOT fail to do) has gotten done late and amid much rush, with imprecations muttered under the breath. At least from my end of things. In my beloved's case there has been much motion -- none of it forward -- which allows her to labor under the misconception that movement equals progress.

But!

Because I am a fairminded sort, I shoulder half of the Christmas burdens. One task which was mine this year: the Making Room Thing.

For those of you "who cannot be arsed" to remember, this is the day when we gather all the ~~$#!+~~ toys accumulated since last Christmas, inspect ruthlessly and donate the stuff that simply isn't being used. People who ought know better say Advent's not a penitential season (minor or otherwise) but will readily agree it is a preparatory season in which the believer makes room for the Holy Child. And making room means making some #$%&ing room. The stuff that is in new (almost always still in the original plastic wrapping, to boot) is rewrapped and put under our church's "Giving tree" and will be given on Christmas morning to the underpriviliged children in the poorer areas of our fair metrop.

(The other stuff is just donated in bulk. But that's another post for another Christmas.)

As a consequence of my worldview -- which may or may not be a particularly unique one -- I am of the mind that we are our brother's keeper and that task is (watch this closely, here) an individual moral obligation. So, it behooves me to actually do* something for my fellow man. It is also important for me to make sure my children actually latch on to the concept, as well. No matter how rough you have it, someone always will be worse off and if it is within your power to help, then help.

Also, because it was my turn to handle this task, I was a bit more...um...ruthless. Appeals to my pity to spare the FIFTH box of K'nex building sets, or the FIFTH Monopoly game or the SIXTH through NINTH Play-Doh playsets, etc. all were as seeds which, in the rocky soil that is my implacable will, could find no purchase. Off they all went.

You simply would not believe, if I told you, how much stuff (new, never opened, never given a glance since Dec. 25, 2007) was hauled away.

So here are some photos, that ye may believe indeed.

This is about 30% of the way into the packing extravaganza. The rules are the gifts must be wrapped and must state whether the gift is for a boy and/or a girl and the appropriate age range.

Here we are about 2/3 packed. Eagle-eyed readers will note those small bags were the ones I used as goody bags for my wife's surprise party last year. (Glad the eBay seller sold me a gross of them!)

Here we see the oldest lad carrying out bags aplenty on either arm. Eventually we had to make two car trips.

And, here are gratuitous shots of our living room mit der tannenbaum

And a gratuituous shot of a test run of the tablescape in progress.

So there you have it.

-J.

* as opposed to "supporting something being done"

Yet more on Cdl. Dulles

2008-12-17T19:58:00.002-05:00

Excellent obituary from The London Sunday Times.

Don't let the door hit your mass on the way out.

2008-12-17T15:21:00.004-05:00

The above, probably, is not the most charitable sentiment I have ever expressed, but the pun was too good to pass up.

Turns out Msgr. Dale Fushek, who is responsible for the LifeTeen Mass -- for which I do not care, he said diplomatically -- has been excommunicated, along with his associate Fr. Mark Dippre, by Phoenix's Bishop, Thomas J. Olmsted, a man who clearly know a thing or two about bishing.

-J.

Dashing through the snow, in a one-horse open meme...

2008-12-17T15:20:00.000-05:00

In lieu of actual bloggery, here you are.

Here's how it works

a) Things you've already done: bold
b) Things you want to do: italicize
c) Things you haven't done and don't want to: underline
d) Things you just haven't done and feel neutral about: plain font

1. Started your own blog. You tell me.

2. Slept under the stars. Once. I'm still in therapy.

3. Played in a band. I almost bolded this, but it never materialized. All those guitar lessons down the drain.

4. Visited Hawaii. To look at DIFFERENT palm trees?

5. Watched a meteor shower. Yawn.

6. Given more than you can afford to charity. Probably.

7. Been to Disneyland/world. More than I can recall for WDW, 5x for DL.

8. Climbed a mountain. No, thanks. (I know Scripture tells us to flee for the mountaintops, but I haven't quite gotten the "flee!" command yet.)

9. Held a praying mantis. Um, why?

10. Sang a solo (in the shower).

11. Bungee jumped. No ~~@#$&ing way~~ thank you. That sounds like a test-run for suicidals.

12. Visited Paris. France, meh.

13. Watched a lightning storm at sea. Nah.

14. Taught yourself an art from scratch. Does hardcore chef-like cooking count?

15. Adopted a child.

16. Had food poisoning. Once. BAD.

17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty.

18. Grown your own vegetables. I usually manage to grow one of whatever I plant then the bloody plant dies.

19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France. France. Meh.

20. Slept on an overnight train. Why did God create airplanes?

21. Had a pillow fight. I may have had a thought or two in that direction but, in my defense, I was young and foolish.

22. Hitch hiked. I once accepted a ride from a stranger, but I had run out of gas AND it was raining buckets.

23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill. Eons ago.

24. Built a snow fort. I was a snow ninja; we traveled light.

25. Held a lamb. Only by the rack, chops or leg.

26. Gone skinny dipping. Once, I believe.

27. Run a Marathon. I've never been chased that far on foot.

28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice. That's for tourists.

29. Seen a total eclipse. Once. Meh.

30. Watched a sunrise or sunset. Mostly the latter.

31. Hit a home run.

32. Been on a cruise. Once. Not as good as "OK" but better than "meh."

33. Seen Niagara Falls in person. Once. Meh.

34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors. Spain and Italy.

35. Seen an Amish community. No, but I've seen 'em at the Reading Street market in Philly.

36. Taught yourself a new language. Italian. Not spectacularly, but yeah.

37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied.

38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

39. Gone rock climbing. Not even indoors.

40. Seen Michelangelo’s David.

41. Sung karaoke. Not with any sobriety .

42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt. Why?

43. Bought a stranger a meal in a restaurant. Done the "sent a bottle of wine over" thing, though.

44. Visited Africa. Not sure if I really want to do this.

45. Walked on a beach by moonlight. It was Spring Break and I was returning to my car. So, yeah, technically.

46. Been transported in an ambulance. Fingers crossed.

47. Had your portrait painted. As a child. I am shuddering at the whole concept.

48. Gone deep sea fishing.

49. Seen the Sistine Chapel.

50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris. WHAT IS THIS OBSESSION WITH PARIS? I mean, really...

51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling. Snorkeling. Meh.

52. Kissed in the rain. It may have been raining, I don't check the Weather Channel.

53. Played in the mud. Um...no.

54. Gone to a drive-in theater. I used to love that when I was a kid. Then naked people started cropping up on screen and my parents immediately desisted.

55. Been in a movie. I even directed it.

56. Visited the Great Wall of China.

57. Started a business. I know. Shocking, innit?

58. Taken a martial arts class. Ditto!

59. Visited Russia.

60. Served at a soup kitchen.

61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies. They don't let boys.

62. Gone whale watching. I'm not good with "nature."

63. Gotten flowers for no reason. Um, no.

64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma. Just the blood.

65. Gone sky diving. @#$% NO.

66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp. I did the the U.S. Holocaust Museum. That was pretty much as much as I could manage.

67. Bounced a check. In college.

68. Flown in a helicopter.

69. Saved a favorite childhood toy. Not for lack of trying.

70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial.

71. Eaten Caviar. And now I'm hungry for blini.

72. Pieced a quilt. Um, no.

73. Stood in Times Square. Only because I was lost.

74. Toured the Everglades. Involuntarily.

75. Been fired from a job. Quit but never fired.

76. Seen the Changing of the Guard in London. I like London, but this isn't on my list of things to do.

77. Broken a bone. My arm.

78. Been on a speeding motorcycle. We weren't going THAT fast, but yeah.

79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person. Nature. Meh.

80. Published a book. I've been published IN a book or two, and a few periodicals, but I've never published one MYSELF.

81. Visited the Vatican. Next time on a pilgrimage.

82. Bought a brand new car. Harrowing.

83. Walked in Jerusalem.

84. Had your picture in the newspaper.

85. Read the entire Bible. Yes. Not in any sequential way, though.

86. Visited the White House. Back when you could.

87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating. Do fish count? Because I've done fish.

88. Had chickenpox. When I was 29. Oy.

89. Saved someone’s life. I've jumped fully dressed into a swimming pool after my youngest when no one else was around.

90. Sat on a jury. Almost

91. Met someone famous. Yes. Mostly they were nice, except for Sam Waterston who was utterly, inexpressively odious.

92. Joined a book club. No, thank you.

93. Lost a loved one.

94. Had a baby. (Not directly.)

95. Seen the Alamo in person. Meh.

96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake. Why?

97. Been involved in a law suit. Usually when a company files Ch. 11 and I have to get my money from those giftcards that are now useless.

98. Owned a cell phone.

99. Been stung by a bee.

Yet more!

2008-12-16T00:28:00.005-05:00

The Funeral Liturgies for Avery Cardinal Dulles, SJ will be webcast by Fordham University at 7.30pm Tuesday & Wednesday

(That's 12/16-17/08)

AMDG,

-J.

Niiiiice.

2008-12-16T00:22:00.002-05:00

Oy.

Our Lady of Bethlehem...ora pro nobis.

-J.

His Eminence Avery Robert Cardinal Dulles, S.J. -- RIP

2008-12-14T12:42:00.006-05:00

Requiem aeternam dona eis, Domine, et lux perpetua luceat eis. Requiescant in pace.

Amen.

Here is a roundup of thoughts on Cdl. Dulles' passing:

Whispers in the Loggia

Jimmy Akin

American Papist

InsightScoop

First Things (lots of great links)

America Magazine (ditto)

The New York Times (it is actually pretty good, even if it is -- inevitably -- NYTish and therefore does contain some of the eye-rollingly expected things)

It is important to note two things about Cdl. Dulles of blessed memory:

1- L'Osservatore Romano has run THREE full-on articles -- usually it's just a reprint of the telegram and a sentence or two that given cardinal's life -- on him and his passing, and

2- He was the only person whom the Pope specifically requested to meet on his trip to the USA.

And here is the Papal Telegram of Condolence's text:

HAVING LEARNED WITH SADNESS OF THE DEATH OF CARDINAL AVERY DULLES, I OFFER YOU MY HEARTFELT CONDOLENCES, WHICH I ASK YOU KINDLY TO CONVEY TO HIS FAMILY, HIS CONFRERES IN THE SOCIETY OF JESUS AND THE ACADEMIC COMMUNITY OF FORDHAM UNIVERSITY. I JOIN YOU IN COMMENDING THE LATE CARDINAL’S NOBLE SOUL TO GOD, THE FATHER OF MERCIES, WITH IMMENSE GRATITUDE FOR THE DEEP LEARNING, SERENE JUDGMENT AND UNFAILING LOVE OF THE LORD AND HIS CHURCH WHICH MARKED HIS ENTIRE PRIESTLY MINISTRY AND HIS LONG YEARS OF TEACHING AND THEOLOGICAL RESEARCH. AT THE SAME TIME I PRAY THAT HIS CONVINCING PERSONAL TESTIMONY TO THE HARMONY OF FAITH AND REASON WILL CONTINUE TO BEAR FRUIT FOR THE CONVERSION OF MINDS AND HEARTS AND THE PROGRESS OF THE GOSPEL FOR MANY YEARS TO COME. TO ALL WHO MOURN HIM IN THE HOPE OF THE RESURRECTION I CORDIALLY IMPART MY APOSTOLIC BLESSING AS A PLEDGE OF CONSOLATION AND PEACE IN OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST.

BENEDICTUS PP. XVI

I have a sneaking suspicion we won't fully realize just what a colossus we have lost for some time.

Cdl. Dulles, ora pro nobis.

AMDG,

-J.

Drat

2008-12-06T23:28:00.000-05:00

I HATE college football these days.

HATE HATE HATE.

Carry on.

-J.

A coupla things here

2008-12-03T08:44:00.003-05:00

1) Today is the feast of St. Francis Xavier, SJ.

Born in 1506 and baptized Francisco; he was a Spanish nobleman (sound familiar?) from the Navarre region, the town of Javier (why the Js turn to Xs is a mystery). He studied and then taught philosophy at the University of Paris, and he had planned to be a professor. However, his friend Saint Ignatius of Loyola convinced him to use his energy and talents to preach the Gospel. Thus he became one of the founding Jesuits, and the first Jesuit missionary.

He was in Goa, India, waiting for passage on a ship, he preached in the street, worked with the sick, and taught children the Catechism.

But, being a Jesuit, he wasn't content with spiritual works alone. In a study of true justice (social or otherwise) he admonished his patron, King Juan of Portugal, over slavery*: “It upsets me to know that at the hour of your death you may be ordered out of Paradise.”

As a tireless missionary, he spent a decade in India, the East Indies, and in Japan, baptizing over 40,000 converts. He went wherever the Spirit told him to go, meeting with tribes of head hunters, caring for lepers, catechizing in India or baptizing 10,000 in a single month. He went on long sea voyages -- in those days that meant being cheek-by-jowl with a zillion others with no, er, plumbing -- enduring harsh extremes of heat and cold. Everywhere he went he would seek out and help the needy and the marginalized.

His zeal for the Gospel can be encapsulated by this prayer he composed:

Eternal God, Creator of all things, remember that You alone has created the souls of unbelievers, which You have made according to Your Image and Likeness. Behold, O Lord, how to Your dishonor many of them are falling into Hell. Remember, O Lord, Your Son Jesus Christ, Who so generously shed His Blood and suffered for them. Do not permit that Your Son, Our Lord, remain unknown by unbelievers, but, with the help of Your Saints and the Church, the Bride of Your Son, remember Your mercy, forget their idolatry and infidelity, and make them know Him, Who You have sent, Jesus Christ, Your Son, Our Lord, Who is our salvation, our life, and our resurrection, through Whom we have been saved and redeemed, and to Whom is due glory forever. Amen.

He traveled thousands upon thousands of miles, mostly barefoot, preaching the Good News with his gift of tongues. He died in 1552 at Sanxian, China of "the fever" which he contracted on a mission journey.

One of the cool things about Jesuits is that when they are "away" they send letters with great frequency to report on their doings. St. Francis Xavier was no different [emphasis mine]:

We have visited the villages of the new converts who accepted the Christian religion a few years ago. The country is so utterly barren and poor. The native Christians have no priests. They know only that they are Christians. There is nobody to say Mass for them; nobody to teach them the Creed, the Our Father, the Hail Mary and the Commandments of God’s Law.
I have not stopped since the day I arrived. I conscientiously made the rounds of the villages. I bathed in the sacred waters all the children who had not yet been baptized. This means that I have purified a very large number of children so young that, as the saying goes, they could not tell their right hand from their left. The older children would not let me say my Office or eat or sleep until I taught them one prayer or another. Then I began to understand: “The kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
I could not refuse so devout a request without failing in devotion myself. I taught them, first the confession of faith in the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit; then the Apostles’ Creed, the Our Father, and Hail Mary. I noticed among them persons of great intelligence. If only someone could educate them in the Christian way of life, I have no doubt that they would make excellent Christians.
Many, many people hereabouts are not becoming Christians for one reason only: there is nobody to make them Christians.
I wish they university students would work as hard at converting these people as
they do at their books, and so settle their account with God for their learning and the talents entrusted to them. This thought would certainly stir most of them to meditate on spiritual realities, to listen actively to what God is saying to them. They would forget their own desires, their human affairs, and give themselves over entirely to God’s will and His choice. They would cry out with all their heart: “Lord, I am here! What do you want me to do?” Send me anywhere you like - even to India!
- from letters to St Ignatius Loyola from St Francis Xavier

Beatified 25 October 1619 by Pope Paul V
Canonized 12 March 1622 by Pope Gregory XV

He is the Patron of:

African missions
Agartala, India
Ahmedabad, India
Alexandria, Louisiana
Apostleship of Prayer
Australia
black missions
Borneo
Cape Town, South Africa
China
Congregation for the Propagation of the Faith
Dinajpur, Bangladesh
East Indies
Fathers of the Precious Blood
foreign missions
Freising, Germany
Goa, India
Green Bay, Wisconsin
India
Indianapolis, Indiana
Japan
Joiliet, Illinois
Kabankalan, Philippines
Malindi, Kenya
missionaries
Missioners of the Precious Blood
Mumbai, India, archdiocese of
Navarre, Spain
navigators
New Zealand
parish missions
plague epidemics

2) The other thing is today's Mass readings. The lovely and gracious Karen reports the miracle of the loaves and fishes is her youngest's favorite in all of Scripture. The lad has a point, because it is the only miracle (Resurrection aside) that is mentioned in all four Gospels. I like the extra little flourish in St. John's, when you get the back story of how they got the loaves and fishes in the first place: a little boy had brought them. It was all this kid had and he trustingly gave it all to Jesus...and in return wound up with basketfuls of bread and fish in return.

"To such as these..."

AMDG,

-J.

* Take THAT, those of you who think the Church used to be in favor of slavery.

Luddites Dot Com

2008-11-28T10:17:00.003-05:00

As someone who is fairly conscientious about being regularly en blogge, as well as normally cranking out 20-25 emails a day, plus missives to assorted online groups, computer-drafted reports and epistles, etc., I have an inordinate fondness for stationery and fountain pens.

[I have also just mangled my shoulder trying to prop up my pillows. Ouch.]

Anyway, because I'm bored and because I'm (among other things) an anachronism of sorts, I just spent a delightful and instructive spell rearranging my stationery and doing a little maintenance work on the fountain pens.

The stationery thing started ages ago, when I was a callow youth. Maybe 18 or so. I spied (through the shop window) a rather comely lass working in a (duh) shop just on the shadow of the Venetian winged lion. Bristling with the bravado that only youth (when flush with a reasonable dose of wine) can possibly have, I stepped through the doorway, the better to afford this young lady an opportunity to avail herself of the manly bounty that was Young Me. It was my every intention, you see, to dazzle her in every respect, to intoxicate her with charm. I don't know exactly how much Valpolicella I had occupying space otherwise earmarked for hæmoglobin, but I was fairly confident that within 20 minutes I'd have her stridently demanding to carry my child. (In contrast, these days my wife loudly demands I carry my child.)

What I had not counted upon was that she'd bedazzle me, and 20 minutes later I had transferred enough currency to her store's coffers to provide me with a small satchel of exquisite papers, cards, envelopes, and the like. All of which she had wrapped up expertly in a semi-glossy purple-pink paper, as if this were all one great Christmas gift. When I had immaturely envisioned her taking advantage of me, this walletectomy was not exactly among the highlights of my teenaged thought process.

But I, being the resilient optimist I am, took the whole episode in stride. I sauntered (as much as someone who has blown an shockingly high percentage of his funds can saunter) to a small bar-type place and ordered a carafe of what two honeymooner-types were having. I produced a cheap pen and started to muse upon what I might write on these excellent papers. My thinking was that I ought send lovely missives from this lovely spot to young ladies back home upon whom I had, er, designs. It struck me as a capital notion, when I was interrupted by my waiter.

Y'see, in Italy, people do not eat by themselves, let alone drink by themselves. Most of my tour (if you want to glorify it with such a term) had consisted of looking up at pretty buildings, occasionally peering inside, and more frequently, stopping at these bar-type counters where locals were loitering amiably and having a tipple of some local-ish wine or another. This was sociable and therefore acceptable.

So a guy with a stack of very expensive paper having a carafe of wine one late afternoon all by his lonesome, y'know, stuck out. The waiter, what with Italians being Italians, surmised that I was writing to Someone Special Back Home and before he deigned give me my carafe -- for which I was paying a 50% premium given that I was seated at an outdoor table -- he told me I couldn't possibly jot down anything on paper such as that with a cheap-o-matic pen. He was taken aback that I was perplexed. I was partly perplexed because he spoke in rapid-fire Italian and it toom me a while to process his Italian through my lingusitic filters. At any rate, he claimed he had an uncle in the business and he took (!) me through a warren, along diminutive alleys, to a small shop which gave the impression of being The Smallest And Best Hidden Colored Pencil Museum In The World.

I was too stunned and cowed to ask what was happening to my carafe of wine. At any rate, Elio (the waiter) engaged Sandro (the colored pencil maven) in animated speech. As they discussed my predicament, Sandro nodded sagely. It was as if a general practitioner and a specialist were conferring. Looking around I saw all manner of inks, quills, pencils, etc. Sandro asked me, the way one would ask a lost and frightened toddler, what I liked. This was good because I could answer something and not feel utterly useless. I rattled off my hobbies and likes. I kept my more prurient interests to myself, although given the fact I was among Italian males they may have taken my silence to mean I had some sort of glandular deficiency.

Sandro nodded sympathetically, much like when a patient says "it hurts when I do this." Sandro looked at Elio.

Gravely -- but sweating self-assurance -- he uttered: "Omas."

I thought he had diagnosed me as heterophobic, but he produced a small box with a brushed aluminum pen, with a pleasantly discreet automotive motif. "This is the best thing for you," I understood him as saying. He then wrapped it up like a Christmas gift (along with an ink bottle, the color of which he chose and didn't bother to let me see), helped himself to my funds and bid me good evening.

Elio, looking as if he had saved me from ravenous marmots, led me back to our starting point, chattering effusively. Another, slightly older, waiter-type guy (Virgilio, I think) came up to us and handed me my stuff. My paper, my misfolded map which he had taken great care to fold properly, assorted brochures, etc. Elio then poured me a glass of wine and took his leave of me, returning to refill my glass with what must have exceeded the contents of my carafe and dropping off -- gratis! -- tiny plates of generally unrecognizable edibles.

That evening, dear reader, I started writing down for all the young ladies of my acquaintance some of the most frightful bilge imaginable. A young man on the cusp between high school and university, with his blood volume amplified by wine is capable of truly appalling stuff* in the quest to be Romeo-like.

But the pleasure of feeling ink glide smoothly from a sleek fountain pen to the surface of a creamy off-white sheet has always stayed with me.

Unlike those poor girls to whom I wrote.

-J.

*That nobody struck me repeatedly about the head and neck is a small miracle.

Thankfulness

2008-11-27T14:20:00.007-05:00

This being Thanksgiving, I thought wise and proper to issue public thanks to God for some things. I mean, yeah, sure, there are the usual things...my wife, my kids, a roof over my head and food on the table. We all know THAT.

So, here are some other things, sort of (but not exactly) in order, for which I am grateful:

• My pal Karen, who usually rants on my behalf so that my family history of hypertension doesn't get nudged awake too often and whom I love to bits. She has, in spades, our Celtic capacity for pathological loyalty and darkness of humor and outlook without being gloomy. She also helps me understand girls better. (Although my limitations in that area are insurmountable.) Finally, she understands me eerily well. I forgive her off-kilter views on college football and motorsports. I'm working on a compare-and-contrast post, so stay tuned.

• My pal MJ, who in the prayer-warrior department is like a paratrooper, SeAL and Force Recon rolled into one.

• The Carmelite Sisters of the Most Sacred Heart of Los Angeles, who in the prayer-warrior dept. are like the 6th Fleet, the 1st Marine Expeditionary Force and the 8th Bomber Wing rolled into one.

• The Society of Jesus, for forming me the way I am. (Credit or blame goes to them.) I'm even grateful for the wayward ones, because they keep me praying at VO2Max.

• The individual Jesuits whom I have met -- some of whom now have causes for sainthood (!) -- who also exemplify holiness and the Church Militant and perseverance under circumstances I cannot even begin to fathom.

• My cyber-sphere of acquaintance who also afford me colossal amounts of e-fellowship.

• All those unnamed gazillions of people who pray for me -- which I need, more than I often realize --and for Davy and his autism. You are always in my prayers.

• Those people who fight the good fight with dignity, grace, and inexhaustible good cheer.

For these and all the others I am -- embarrassedly -- blanking on, I thank you, Lord.

AMDG,

-J.

Thanksgivingness

2008-11-27T09:44:00.002-05:00

This is last year's Thanksgiving post. I thought it worthwhile to repost.

AMDG,

-J.

While Thanksgiving is a holiday quite dear to Americans, as well as being something rather uniquely American also, most Americans (particularly, but not exclusively, those educated at gummint schools) have only the dimmest idea of what the history of the day has been. So here are a few tidbits. (All emphases mine.)

A particularly apt place to start is George Washington's 1789 Thanksgiving proclamation:

Whereas it is the duty of all Nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor -- and whereas both Houses of Congress have by their joint Committee requested me "to recommend to the People of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many signal favors of Almighty God especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness.

Now therefore I do recommend and assign Thursday the 26th day of November next to be devoted by the People of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being, who is the beneficent Author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be -- That we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks -- for His kind care and protection of the People of this Country previous to their becoming a Nation -- for the signal and manifold mercies, and the favorable interpositions of His Providence which we experienced in the tranquility, union, and plenty, which we have since enjoyed -- for the peaceable and rational manner, in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted -- for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed; and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and in general for all the great and various favors which He hath been pleased to confer upon us.
And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech Him to pardon our national and other transgressions -- to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually -- to render our national government a blessing to all the people, by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed -- to protect and guide all Sovereigns and Nations (especially such as have shown kindness onto us) and to bless them with good government, peace, and concord -- To promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us -- and generally to grant unto all Mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as He alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand at the City of New York the third day of October in the year of our Lord 1789.

George Washington

Since it was, of course, Abe Lincoln who made Thanksgiving the yearly holiday it is now, we ought groove mightily with what he wrote on the subj.:

The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty God. In the midst of a civil war of unequalled magnitude and severity, which has sometimes seemed to foreign States to invite and to provoke their aggression, peace has been preserved with all nations, order has been maintained, the laws have been respected and obeyed, and harmony has prevailed everywhere except in the theatre of military conflict; while that theatre has been greatly contracted by the advancing armies and navies of the Union. Needful diversions of wealth and of strength from the fields of peaceful industry to the national defence, have not arrested the plough, the shuttle, or the ship; the axe had enlarged the borders of our settlements, and the mines, as well of iron and coal as of the precious metals, have yielded even more abundantly than heretofore. Population has steadily increased, notwithstanding the waste that has been made in the camp, the siege and the battle-field; and the country, rejoicing in the consciousness of augmented strength and vigor, is permitted to expect continuance of years, with large increase of freedom.

No human counsel hath devised nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things. They are the gracious gifts of the Most High God, who, while dealing with us in anger for our sins, hath nevertheless remembered mercy.

It has seemed to me fit and proper that they should be solemnly, reverently and gratefully acknowledged as with one heart and voice by the whole American people. I do therefore invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States, and also those who are at sea and those who are sojourning in foreign lands, to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national perverseness and disobedience, commend to His tender care all those who have become widows, orphans, mourners or sufferers in the lamentable civil strife in which we are unavoidably engaged, and fervently implore the interposition of the Almighty Hand to heal the wounds of the nation and to restore it as soon as may be consistent with the Divine purposes to the full enjoyment of peace, harmony, tranquillity and Union.

In testimony whereof, I have hereunto set my hand, and caused the seal of the United States to be affixed.

Done at the city of Washington, this third day of October, in the year of our Lord one thousand eight hundred and sixty-three, and of the independence of the United
States the eighty-eighth.

A. Lincoln

Finally, it bears noting that most people have a very, er, abridged version of the Thanksgiving narrative. Usually i9t goes something like this: The Pilgrims' ship, The Mayflower, finally alighting on Plymouth Rock, the local tribes show up and feed then and they are grateful and have a feast.

[What people never hear or read about is how miserable a voyage it was. The trip was long, arduous and, frankly, nauseatingly stench-ridden. Once the ship had landed, fires were set throughout the ship to smoke out the stench of 102 people crammed in there for months on end with no plumbing facilities. Then it got worse.] The place was barren and desolate (even the indigenous types knew to give it a mighty wide berth) and during the first winter, half of the Pilgrims died of starvation, sickness or exposure.

Finally, Spring sprang and the local tribes showed the Pilgrims how to plant corn, fish for cod and trap beavers for fur. And pretty much this is where the story stops, and we all skip ahead to Pilgrims eating turkey. The fact is the Pilgrims were managing to scrape out a survival existence, but not being much more of a hit than that.

Here's the part you didn't know: The Pilgrims didn't actually have the coin needed to swing the cruise from Europe to Plymouth Rock. So, they made a contract with some investors in London (the system was called mercantilism) and agreed to pay them back with whatever their community could produce. Being a starry-eyed bunch of Neo-Utopians, they had agreed to produce things in common and everyone was given an equal share of the total.

Of course, they didn't ask me and were therefore were quite surprised -- much like certain benighted theologians of today would have been -- when this centralized system of collective production and allocation, frankly, er, sucked dead wombats. Gov. Bradford, desperate for a new system that would generate serious production, not only for survival but to cover their debts to the merchants in London, changed the scheme. He assigned individual parcels of land to each family to farm and control as they best saw fit.

About this whole matter, Bradford wrote:

The experience that we had in this common course and condition, tried sundry years...that by taking away property, and bringing community into a common wealth, would make them happy and flourishing – as if they were wiser than God.

For this community [arrangement] was found to breed much confusion and discontent, and retard much employment that would have been to their benefit and comfort. For young men that were most able and fit for labor and service did repine that they should spend their time and strength to work for other men's wives and children without any recompense...that was thought injustice.

Then came the changeover from common to individual property. Gov. Bradford wrote

This had very good success, for it made all hands industrious, so as much more corn was [harvested] than otherwise would have been.

By the late summer, the Pilgrims realized they had much more crops than could be eaten by their settlement. They set up a trading system whereby they exchanged goods with the local tribes. They experience such profits they were able to pay off the the merchants in London. They were so grateful to God for this turnabout in their fortune they held a feast of Thanksgiving.

Now you know the whole story of Thanksgiving.

Feel better?

Bein' Mean to Karen

2008-11-26T15:06:00.002-05:00

Thanksgiving: The Pie

2008-11-26T10:09:00.002-05:00

OK, OK, OK. Alright already, sheesh.

Maple-Pecan Pie

Shell:
1¼ cups all-purpose flour, and some for dusting (I like King Arthur, but Pillsbury Unbleached is good also)
2 generous Tbsp. sugar
2 fat pinches of salt
1¼ sticks of butter (8+2 Tbsp.) sliced into as many pats as your patience allows. If you are REALLY hardcore, you can replace the ¼ stick w. 2 Tbsp. lard. Either way after cutting the fats small, chill again.
1 egg, separated (beat the white lightly w. enough ice water to make ¼cup; beat the yolk with ¼tsp. of water to make an egg wash)

Put sugar and salt into food processor and whiz until powdered. Add flour and pulse. Add butter (and lard...but avoid anything hydrogenated) and pulse until it looks like a coarse cornmeal, about 10-15 seconds. Mix in egg white (be VERY careful if you use the food processor, you can end up w. some tough crust...if you are unsure, dump everything into a bowl and use a spatula) until you get a dough. Flatten dough into a rough disk, dust with flour and chill at least an hour.

Roll out dough on a floured surface until you end up with a 13" circle. CAREFULLY drape over a 9" pie plate (I like those glass Pyrex ones), but a nonstick tart pan works also. Trim the edges even and then flute the edges as you see fit (forks, your kids' fingerprints...whatever). Freeze the raw shell for an hour. Take out enough foil to cover the shell completely and poke it (the shell) all over with a fork. Take out shell and poke THAT also. Wrap and put back in freezer while you preheat oven to 400F. Take out shell and put pie weights over the foil (I use large steel BBs). Bake in the center rack for about 15 minutes, remove foil bake an additional ten, glaze with the egg wash and bake off for one more minute until it's all golden and pretty. Keep warm.

Filling

½ stick of butter cut into 1" chunks
½ cup sugar (superfine is ideal, but regular works fine)
¼ tsp. salt (if you use a coarse salt, make sure you get it down to a fine grain)
3 eggs (large)
1 cup maple syrup (I like the Grade B from Vermont Sugarworks, but you can use Grade A amber...make sure you are using 100% pure maple syrup, not some "pancake syrup" dreck.)
6 oz (about a cup-and-a-half) pecans, crushed coarsely

Preheat oven to 275F. Over a double boiler melt butter; remove the top vessel and then stir in sugar and salt. Beat in eggs fully and THEN beat in syrup. Return to double boiler configuration and stir briskly until the whole thing is nice and glossy. Remove again and stir in pecan bits. Pour into shell and bake about 55 minutes, until the center jiggles S-L-I-G-H-T-L-Y. Remove and cool completely.

This pie is the perfect balance between firm and lush with a yielding -- but not squishy -- texture. Above all else, there is none of that vile corn syrup.

-J.

Thanksgiving: The Stuffing/Dressing

2008-11-25T10:05:00.002-05:00

The post immediately below is the one for the mashed potatoes. If your starch choices run to the more substantial, go there.

OK, here it is. This will stuff one turkey, so get your calculators out if'n you need to stuff 2 or 3.

Pecan-Sausage Stuffing

1 lb stale sourdough or cornbread cut into ½" cubes (I like cornbread)
1 lb. bulk breakfast sausage, hot, medium or mild (I like hot, but everyone yells at me. If your butcher makes this fresh, so much the better)
1 large Spanish onion, diced
4 cloves garlic, minced
½ lb. button mushrooms sliced ¼" thick
¼ lb. pecan halves
1 cup half-and-half (whole milk or evaporated skim milk will work also)
1½ cups chicken or turkey stock (if you use store bought get the kind that packed aseptically AND is low sodium, but even at "low sodium" you will probably not need to salt the stuffing.)
Coarse (sea/Kosher) salt and freshly ground pepper, to taste

In a large pot over medium heat, brown the sausage and then pour off about half the drippings. Add the onion, garlic and mushrooms and cook, breaking up the meat into small pieces with a wooden spoon, until the meat browns and is cooked through and the onions are translucent, say 10 minutes. Remove from the heat and fold in the bread cubes, pecans and half-and-half. Stir in the stock until the mixture is moistened to your liking. Season with salt and pepper. DO NOT let cool before stuffing into the cavity of the turkey, unless you have a thing for pathogens.

You may also put this in a casserole and bake at 350F for about 20-30 minutes. If you like a crisp top layer don't cover it with foil, if you like it moist, cover it. If you like it in-between, cover it for the first 10-15 minutes, then unwrap.

Figure this serves 8 to 10.

Thanksgiving: The (Heretical) Mashed Potatoes

2008-11-25T10:01:00.001-05:00

Come Thanksgiving, there are, at the average table, enough starches to make Dr. Atkins spin like a lathe in his grave. Biscuits, corn, cornbread, sweet potatoes (and/or yams) and rolls are just a partial list of the starched attendees. But here is my starch of choice.

WARNING: CULINARY HERESIES FOLLOW

Whipped Yukon Gold Potatoes

4 lb. Yukon Gold potatoes, UNpeeled
1 cup buttermilk
½ cup sour cream or sour half-and-half (sometimes sold as "Light Sour Cream")
8 Tbs. (1 stick) unsalted butter
1½ - 2 cups cream (you can use evaporated skim milk, it will still be pretty good)
¼ tsp. baking powder
1-2 scallions or 8-10 chives (green parts only, sliced t-h-i-n-l-y on the diagonal)
Salt and freshly ground (ideally white) pepper, to taste

Bring a large pot two-thirds full of water to a boil over high heat. Add the potatoes and cook until tender, about 30 minutes. (You can pre-zap 'em in the microwave) Drain the potatoes in a colander and let them steam dry about 5 minutes.

Normally, the pedestrian step at this point is to cut them in equatorial halves and pass the potatoes through a potato ricer into the bowl of an electric stand mixer fitted with the whisk attachment. Put we are going to do something VERY heretical. You have to take me on faith at this point, so if you're the tiniest bit cowardly, bail out NOW. OK, let the potatoes cool a bit and then peel and cut*.

Throw the potatoes (you may have to do this in batches, so watch your proportions!!) into a food processor. EVERY cookbook on God's green earth will tell you this way lies madness. They will tell you this is heretical and they will tell you you will wind up with spackle. Ignore them. Add the sour cream, butter**, baking powder, salt and white pepper, and process the potatoes until smooth. This will be VERY dense and exactly what you do not wish to serve. Here comes the master stroke, ready?

With the processor running, slowly dribble in the cream (fine, the evaporated milk) and then the buttermilk*** until you get the consistency you like. The potatoes will have miraculously turned into the fluffiest damned things you have ever seen...you'd think it was a soufflé or a mousse of some sort. Taste and adjust the seasonings with salt and pepper, garnish with scallion or chive bits. Serve immediately. If you will keep these warm for a bit in, say, an oven, you may want them a TEENY bit runnier than you'd like, since the warming process will dry and firm them to your desired standards.

-J.

P.S. The reasons why the food processor turns potatoes to spackle are twofold: a) The blades action shears open a great many starch cells (which tend to bind when they cool) and b) most people use russet/Idaho potatoes which are extra-starchy to begin with. The idea for this is a riff on Joel Robuchon -- who has more Michelin stars than anyone, and HE ought to know -- who used to do this same thing, only his dairy component was straight butter, cut into bits (it eventually worked out to something like 1 lb. butter for every 2 lb. of potato). Yes, caloric.

* If you cut the potatoes before cooking, the water will gelatinize the starch in the potatoes and you WILL wind up with spackle.
** The fat in these dairy ingredients will help isolate a number of starch cells in the potatoes, to minimize the spackle effect.
*** The buttermilk's acid will react with the baking powder to provide "fluff".

Another bishop who knows his bishing

2008-11-25T07:06:00.000-05:00

Love this guy.

-J.

What have I been telling you?

2008-11-24T10:50:00.001-05:00

An interesting perspective, although I'd pick a bone or two. Still. Look.

-J.

Tea and No Tea

2008-11-21T14:55:00.006-05:00

(H/t InsightScoop)

Maria Shriver, a Malibu Kennedy, engages in a glaring repetition of the wholly expected. Check this countercultural shot across the bow:

“I don’t believe that if someone’s divorced they shouldn’t get Communion; I don’t believe that people who are gay shouldn’t be accepted into the Church… I’m pro-choice, I believe women should have that right.” She also said “women should have a larger role in the Catholic Church.”

The title of this entry is a reference to Douglas Adams and his "interactive fiction" version of The Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy, wherein the lead character finally achieves the knowledge and enlightnement he needs when he can hold two completely contradictory things (i.e., having "tea" and having "no tea") simultaneously. In order for him to arrive at this point, he must remove the part of his brain that controls common sense.

This is what La Shriver is implicitly doing and asking us to do.

Please note her fellow travelers aren't reacting to any news from the Vatican, any new dictum from the Holy Father or any new development on anything. They are bent outa shape because the Holy See hasn't issued anything. It's still holding on to the fusty-musty ol' doctrine it always has.

So why call yourself Catholic? The current Mrs. Governator famously contributed to a work with the title Why I'm Still A Catholic. (We'll set aside the issue of why remaining a Catholic is so bizarre a phenomenon that it requires lengthy explanation.) This leads me to worry about her catechetical background, because if it's not the problem here, then her logic circuits must be emitting wisps of smoke and making "fzzt! fzzt!" sounds.

What distinguishes the Catholic Church from all other faiths is the tenet that it is infallible*; that it cannot teach error. Even if it wanted to. But if the Church were to say that bigamy, now that we think about it, is not sinful...then it either taught error when it said it was, or is teaching error when it now says it ain't. Something is wrong always and everywhere, or it isn't.

Now, if the Church's claim to infallibility is wrong -- why trust it to be right about anything? Put another way, if it's wrong on something, it can be wrong on anything. If it can be wrong on anything, then all its doctrines are nothing but carefully forged links joined up and hanging on a hook firmly screwed into...thin air.

Sadly, Shriveresque Catholics are still Catholic hoping the Church will reverse a coupla millennia of doctrine on X and somehow remain infallible. They want to have "tea" and "no tea." What their broadsides mean to those who adhere to the view the Church is right whether we like it or not, is that they put up with us in the hope we'll stop thinking that what the Church holds to be true is, in fact, true.

The difference is that we put up with them because we want them to see the light and recognize that "it is what it is" and that God's dictates are His ordained will and not the current bylaws of a theological condo association. It's not a matter of us being hardhearted, or cruel, or reactionary...it's just that we recognize that contradiction and revelation are incompatible.

Whether we like it or not.

-J.

* I paraphrase Flannery O'Connor: If it's not infallible, then to Hell with it.

Think back.

2008-11-21T14:10:00.003-05:00

Remember this?

DO NOT STOP. IT'S WORKING.

As you were,

-J.

Thanksgiving: The Turkey

2008-11-19T21:45:00.004-05:00

For most people, through most of our lives, the turkey is a perennial letdown. The dark meat is gamy and liver-ish, the white meat is moisture-free to the extent Dr. Heimlich would be alarmed, the skin is flabby and greasy and the flavor is non-existent.

But no more.

I'm going to steer you through this. It's gonna be OK. Come in off the ledge.

Herb-Roasted Turkey.

First, you're gonna need to get the right turkey. Do NOT get any turkey injected with any bizarro ingredients. Do NOT get any ::cough, cough:: self-basting turkey. Do NOT get a turkey that's has spent its nasty, brutish and short life jacked on hormones and antibiotics. These are wrong. Get yourself a free-range, all-natural, etc., etc. turkey. I swear by Bell & Evans; Plainfield Farms and Empire Kosher are also quite good, but get whatever your supermarket/butcher carries (you may have to order ahead).

It is not necessary (but it IS nice) to get an heirloom turkey or one of those $150 boutique turkeys. Just make sure it's all natural and free range and EITHER frozen (not bad, actually) or NEVER frozen. Those frozen-then-thawed suckers are beyond flavorless.

Next -- unless you get a Kosher bird -- brine the turkey. This is the voodoo part of the equation, so go slow here, OK? First you'll need to make an herb infusion. Get dried (BUT NOT GROUND) thyme, marjoram and sage, in decreasing order at a 3:2:1 ratio. A lot will depend on the time you have available to brine (all day or overnight?), the size of the bird (12lb or 20lb?) and the vessel to contain it (a bucket or a big-arse cooler?) and whether you are starting with a fresh or frozen bird.

To get a rough idea, put the still-wrapped turkey in the vessel and fill with plain tap water. Remove bird and measure water. If you're doing a short brine you will need more salt, possibly sugar, and herb flavoring than if you're letting the beast soak a full day. The rule of thumb is 1 cup salt (if you use kosher or sea salt, get the SMALL crystal not the big honkin' flake variety) per gallon for a 4 hour brining for a 12-14lb. turkey. The longer the brining, the less salt you need and conversely, the bigger the bird the more salt you will need...so an overnight brining will use half the salt and a 22 lb. behemoth will use twice the salt. You get the idea. The dried herbs--in the case of a one gallon brine-- should be 3 teaspoons thyme, 2 teaspoons marjoram and 1 teaspoon sage. Add these to a cup of simmering water and steep for 3-5 minutes. Dissolve the salt in the gallon(s) minus one cup and add the herb infusion slowly. Depending on how strong and/or fresh your herbs are you may not need to add all the infusion to the brine...if you go overboard, it may start tasting like you're pickling the turkey, so watch it.

That done, remove the giblet-y bits and put the turkey and brine in your vessel (ideally a cooler) and let it soak. If you cannot fit this into a fridge (and most people can't), drop in those blue gel freezer packs to keep the temperature around 40F. If you are using a frozen turkey, you can skip the gel packs, but give it an extra hour in the brine.

Now, take the turkey out of the brine and pat it dry.

[OPTIONAL] Put it on the roasting rack, and that in the roasting pan. (If you have room, you can put this as is for 8-24 hours to air dry in the fridge. The longer the better, for an shatteringly crisp, mahogany skin.) Dump brine down the drain, and rinse. Fill bottom 1/3 of cooler with ice and nestle the laden roasting pan in the ice. Let it air dry for the aforementioned 8-24 hours. If you feel vaguely heroic, use a blow dryer on the skin.[/OPTIONAL]

OK, show time.

Take out a stick of butter. Remove your turkey from its fridge/cooler rest, letting it come up to room temperature. Preheat oven to 425F. Remove your rings and all that. Take 3 yellow onions (trim off the extreme ends, peel, and cut into rough half-wedges), a head of garlic (loosen the cloves and then smack 'em with the flat of a knife to peel them and crush them slighly) and three lemons (quarter one and THICKLY slice the other two). Smush in another 3 teaspoons thyme, 2 teaspoons marjoram and 1 teaspoon sage and 1 teaspoon of fresh ground black pepper into the butter. Run your hands CAREFULLY between the skin and the flesh of the turkey, to loosen.

Smear a third of your herb-butter goop inside the skin, another third inside the cavity and the last third on the outside. Make sure the coverage is even. Stuff the cavity with the quartered lemon, 3-4 chunks of onion and 6-7 smacked garlic cloves. Scatter the remaining garlic/onion/lemon debris around the turkey in the roasting pan and add about 1" of water. If you have it (and you really should), stick in one of those probe thermometers into the thickest part of the breast, making sure you do not touch the bone. DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, TRUSS THE BIRD. Agents of Satan will try to thwart you, but keep them at bay with a bulb baster. I'm serious.*

Put the whole rack into your oven. Roast for 30 minutes until the breast skin just starts to get all golden**. Drop the oven temperature to 325F. If the breast meat is browned by this point you may want to cover it with foil at this stage. When the breast meat registers 165F (this should be 2.5, maybe 3, hours after you dropped the temperature. Your oven could be a bit off, or your room temperature colder or warmer, so don't get all hung up on this...of course, if you have a larger turkey--18lb or so--this could mean an extra 90 minuts of roasting) turn off your oven and leave it shut for 30-45 minutes as you go about your business and the turkey rests.

Remove turkey and unstuff; set it aside on the cutting board. Put roasting rack astride two burners on medium. Add about a cup of water or chicken or turkey stock and deglaze (pick out any lemon skin -- roasted lemon pulp is lovely here -- which will definitely be bitter) . Put all the roasted vegetables and juices and drippings into your blender and puree, adding chicken stock as needed until you get a gravy with the thickness you prefer. I like it the viscosity of a milkshake, but you do whatever. Taste and adjust the salt and pepper.

Carve turkey and bask in the slavish fawning of your loved ones.

-J.

* The problem with trussing is that it makes the discrepancy between leg/breast cooking times even worse. That is, the dark meat is done at 180F while the white meat is ready at 170F. Trussing only makes the dark meat take longer to come to temperature, by which point the breast is turkey flavored, moisture-free particle board. Or, the breast meat is perfect and the legs are still kicking. So, no trussing. Ever.

** Some people like put the temperature at an even 325F and start roasting the bird face down and then flip about halfway. Me? I don't like an oven open while all this is going on (and the built-up heat taking a hike to the ceiling) and it's a total PITA to open the thing, pull the rack somewhere heat-safe, manage to get a grip on the bird, flip the turkey without sending searing-hot metal items and vegetable matter flying every which-a-way, etc.) If you notice--and you have to be vigilant here--the breast skin getting too golden too fast, cover it in a LOOSE double layer of aluminum foil and leave it there until the last hour of roasting. But that shouldn't happen if your oven is close to accurate.

It might go something like this...

2008-11-19T17:03:00.004-05:00

I'm visualizing the scene between a fictitious Wayward Catholic Politician (we'll call him Mayor Quimby) and his fictitious local ordinary, who also happens to be a friend of the WCP as well as a bit wobbly on doctrine his own self.

[phone rings]

Mayor: Hello, this is the Mayor.

Bishop: Mayor Quimby, these fundamentalist loons are driving me mental.

Mayor: Me too. Thought we had driven them all out.

Bishop: Me too. Anyway, they have their skivvies in a knot over your remarks at the "Swingers Have Rights, Too!" rally.

Mayor: Oh, for crying out loud! What now?

Bishop: Among other things they think it's inappropriate for a Catholic public figure to be at a rally where people were chanting "Yes We Can! If we take Cialis!"

Mayor: Well, *I* didn't chant that! And it wasn't MY idea to paint the Goodyear blimp in that fleshtone...

Bishop: Still, they object to you, as a Catholic and elected official saying that marriage shouldn't exclude a man and a woman and another woman "especially if..." wait, I need my glasses... "if she's, like, smokin' hot."

Mayor: But, see, this is where these Falwell Catholics fall apart...most of them are NOT smoking hot. They're just frumpy ol' house...

Bishop: Still, they're breathing down my collar. One day someone in Rome might take a glance this way and, y'know, get the, er, wrong idea.

Mayor: So?

Bishop: So, as your bishop, they say I'm supposed to do something.

Mayor: Like?

Bishop: Wait. I had the manual right here. Criminy it's dusty [coughing fit]. Okay. I'm supposed to make sure you have fitness to receive Communion.

Mayor: I did that when I was seven.

Bishop: I mean when you attend Mass.

Mayor: Oh! No big. I mean, when do I attend Mass?

Bishop: Good point, but I don't think that will calm down these Almost Evangelicals. I have to make sure you are fit for Communion.

Mayor: And if I'm not?

Bishop: That's what we're here to explore.

Mayor: How?

Bishop: Well, first I have to make really, totally double-dog sure you fully understand the Church's teaching on wife-swapping parties. Then if you still say things these guys say are wrong, I have to admonish you, and then after THAT I have to warn you that you are not in position to receive Communion.

Mayor: So you're admonishing me?

Bishop: Heavens, no! [to someone in the office] Thanks, that's lovely...Muriel, could I get more sugar? Thanks. [back] Sorry.

Mayor: So if you're not admonishing me...

Bishop: Oh, we're not anywhere near that yet. I'm calling to set up an appointment to explain to you, fully, the Church's teaching on orgies.

Mayor: Um, 'kay. When is good for you?

Bishop: Let's see...[mumbles to someone in the office] okay...how's the 22nd?

Mayor: No can do. I'm going to ask for a federal bailout on the 22nd. The 24th?

Bishop: I have a "Quench The Thristy!" rally and Mass at the Stadium. I tell you, I found these chrome-y looking plastic pitchers and wineglasses, so when these guys see this on YouTube they'll never notice...

Mayor: How about the 25th?

Bishop: That's Christmas. [longish pause] The Holiday, Larry...work with me here.

Mayor: Oh. Sorry.

Bishop: It is my busiest workday. Lunch on the 26th?

Mayor: OK, but a late lunch.

Bishop: Fine, good. Y'know my Anglican friend, Bishop Jefferts-Schori calls the 26th Boxing Day.

Mayor: [distractedly talking to someone off-phone] Pardon me, Bishop?

Bishop: "God, the Father of mercies, through the death and resurrection of his Son has reconciled the world to himself and sent the Holy Spirit among us for the forgiveness of sins; through the ministry of the Church may God give you pardon and peace, and I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit. Amen." [chuckles paternally] You see, Larry, sometimes the Spirit DOES guide us!

Mayor: That was easy!

Bishop: See you Sunday.

Thanksgiving: The Salad

2008-11-16T18:23:00.001-05:00

Here is the next episode in a stress-free Thanksgiving.

Watercress/Bacon/Granny Smith salad

As usual, do not obsess over exact measurements and times unless otherwise directed.

4-6 strips really good bacon (as usual, I like Nueske's)
4 large bunches watercress, about 2 lb. total, stemmed and separated
½ tsp. salt, plus more as needed
3 Tbs. apple cider vinegar and/or lemon juice
½ tsp. freshly ground pepper, plus more as needed
3 small, ripe but firm Granny Smith apples

1- Julienne the bacon. In a small saucepan cook over low heat until VERY crisp but not burned. Remove to drain and reserve 5 tbsp. of the bacon drippings (if you need to augment, you should use peanut oil) and allow them to cool somewhat; you want the drippings to be "warm to the touch."

2- Peel and core apples. Dice or julienne (big or small, depending how rustic or frou-frou you want this to be) them and put in a bowl with a bit of extra lemon juice or vinegar and JUST enough water to cover (this will prevent discoloration).

3- In a large bowl, place the watercress and drizzle with the bacon drippings and toss. Sprinkle the ½ tsp. salt over the watercress and toss again. Add the bacon and vinegar/lemon and the ½ tsp. pepper and toss well. Add apple bits and toss again. Taste and correct the salt and pepper.

OPTIONAL: Sprinkle some crumbled blue cheese (I like Maytag blue) and/or crushed nut (walnut/hazelnut/almond, etc.) bits.

You may also substitute frisee or mache for the watercress.

-J.

Shedding further light.

2008-11-15T23:50:00.003-05:00

If you saw this, you may be interested in the following...

(This was translated by me, as I found it. The only thing I did "extra" was to put certain things in [brackets] for a more equivalent translation. That's it.)

Diario Rio Negro [Rio Negro Daily] Aug. 19/08

NEUQUÉN (AN).-

"I am the bishop, do you understand? If you want to pray, go inside. You are the ones picking a fight. Here in Neuquén this is not done. You are the ones responsible."

- Responsible for what?

- For picking a fight.

- We don't want to have a fight with anyone, we want to defend...

- What are you defending now, if there's nobody here?

- What do you mean there is nobody? We are defending the monument [i.e. the Cathedral].

- In Neuquén the monument is defended in other ways.

This was the level of tension of the dialogue on Sunday afternoon between Bishop Marcelo Melani and a group of Catholic youth which had assembled in front of the Cathedral to pray, waiting for a massive march of [feminists] expected to pass by.

The conversation, which was held [with raised voices], ended when the youth further raised their voice to pray an Our Father and drowned out the bishop, who opted to withdraw.

Just a few moments later the incidents began: some of the women who participated in the march seized the banner held by the youth, which was inscribed with the phrase "Neuquén chooses life." [The youth] did not stop praying.

Yesterday Melani tried to downplay the importance of these events. "One hopes an encounter would be just that, a place where ideas can be confronted, but with respect, in a [spirit of] democracy that is most complete, most total, with respect for the person who might manifest opposite ideas," he said on radio station LU5.

He added that "in general these massive encounters always have some possibility of disorder on the part of someone, there is always some little group drawing all the attention."

He recalled an instance "in front, [at the head of things] were all the media waiting for something to pass to record it; yesterday (Sunday) the same thing was happening in front of the Cathedral: people remained in front [of the Cathedral], waiting to see what might happen there, and the media did as well."

"There is no need to give [an exaggerated] importance to the actual event," said Melani. "What all have to seek is a capacity for coexistence, of mutual acceptance, even when we have ideological differences."

AMDG,

-J.

Thanksgiving: The Soup

2008-11-15T17:31:00.001-05:00

This here is the world-famous "Endless Carrot Soup." I mentioned it a while back under its "endless" moniker because it has nearly limitless possibilities for variation, but this will likely be the variation--of the endless variations, hence the name--possible with this soup. As you pore over the measurements and times keep in mind this is pretty freehand, measure-by-eyeballing stuff, so don't get all hung up on the exact thing written.

1 large onion or two medium leeks (white & pale green parts only)
2T butter or rendered bacon drippings (or a combination)
2t smoked paprika
2 cloves garlic
1 lb. carrots
2 c. chicken stock

Sauté the (roughly diced) onion or leeks (cleaned well) in the butter or bacon drippings. Cook for a long time (15 minutes at least) over medium heat, just to "sweat" then slightly caramelize. Add paprika and garlic and cook for a couple minutes longer. Add carrots, peeled and sliced. Continue to saute for another 5 minutes (ideally, you want to caramelize a bit of the carrot). Add stock to cover by an inch, and cook for 20 minutes at a steady simmer, until carrots are tender.

Here is the tricky bit! This soup tastes better made a 2-3 days before so you should stop here, and allow it to cool. Cool soup will be much easier to puree in a regular blender (pureeing hot soups in blenders will be slow or explosive or both) until the soup is smooth. You can, of course, use a food mill, food processor, or a hand blender but nothing beats the regular blender for smoothness. After pureeing, which can be a couple of days before, bring back to a simmer and season with salt--be careful if you used commercial chicken stock!!!--and pepper to taste.

Ladle into bowls or tureen and finish soup with some creme fraiche (or cream or sour cream) swirled all pretty-like to the tune of about 1T per bowl and a sprinkling of crumbled bits of bacon and/or minced leek tops (the medium green parts, the "ashy" green parts are mostly useless) or chives.

There ya go. Stress-free, make-ahead and stunningly delicious. Good for ya, too.

-J.

P.S. You can use scallions or shallots in place of the onions and SHARPLY seasoned, homemade croutons are also good. (Croutons in the box -- shudder! -- are best left there.)

Someone who should NOT be a priest

2008-11-14T11:20:00.002-05:00

This guy should be a bishop, instead.

-J.

Thanksgiving's preamble.

2008-11-14T01:03:00.004-05:00

OK.

To get my mind off this #$%& election thing, I hereby begin my series on Thanksgiving -- my absolute fave holiday, in case you missed it -- by running down my tentative menu.

Be warned.

This is a foodie menu.

It's for foodies, by as inveterate a foodie as can be found.

There will be no tolerance for stuffing from boxes, broth from cans, condiments from cartons or vegetables from the freezer. If your idyllic, mind's-eye Thanksgiving calls for Tater-Tots®, cranberry jelly still holding the shape of the can in which you purchased it, or some indifferent, particleboard, factory-raised turkey riddled with hormones and phosphates...if that's what you prefer, then go on to the next blog.

You have been warned.

The Menu this year is:

1- "Endless carrot" soup
2- Watercress/bacon/Granny Smith salad
3- Herbed roast turkey
4- Whipped "heretical" Yukon Gold potatoes
5- For Real (i.e. roast turkey drippings-based) roast garlic gravy
6- Sausage & cornbread dressing/stuffing (I prefer it as dressing, you salmonella harlots do whatever you want)
7- Cranberry-orange chutney
8- Sauteed pearl onions with green beans
9- Pecan-maple (i.e. "Appomatox") pie
10- Pumpkin creme brulee

Yes. I cook from scratch. For 56 people. (I'm a frustrated chef. Karen, please feel free to add that to the list of things I should have been, instead of a Strategic Consulant who taunts his family history of hypertension. on the plus side, think of the fringe benefits of passing by the lunch room when I'm there, along with my margarita and espresso Mad Skillz.)

To drink: Sam Adams Cranberry Lambic and/or 2006 Ravenswood Winery "Old Vine Lodi" Zinfandel (red, not that unspeakably vile and saccharine pink stuff).

Everything, save for the turkey, can be made completely (or substantially) ahead, so there will also be little drama here. I might even dredge up pictures to show you how and what.

As you were.

-J.

Karen, stay tuned.

2008-11-13T09:55:00.004-05:00

For my post on the importance of coffee, how to make the CORRECT cappuccino (and caffé latte, if you must) and how deeply involved Jesuits are in all of the above.

-J.

How to win friends, and influence people.

2008-11-13T09:47:00.004-05:00

The horror!

Dancers at a gay disco in Lansing, Mich., were stunned Saturday when members of a pro-Christian, pro-law & order organization named Bible Thump interrupted their revels to fling propaganda and Rosaries around the dance floor, drape a banner with a Bible verse from the balcony and feature two nuns preaching from the DJ stand.

According to a blog posting by Lisa De Leeuw on Little Dutch Boy, the Bible Thump organization orchestrated a protest in front of Fire and Glitter disco to draw the club's security staff away from the dance floor.
Then Bible Thumpers who had dressed up in leather and seat-less chaps and mixed in with dancers took action.

According to De Leeuw, "'It's Rainin' Men, Hallelujah!' had just finished when men and women stood up in pockets across the bar, on the main floor and in the balcony.

"'Jesus died for you,' they shouted among other hate speech and derogatory statements as they rushed the stage. Some forced their way through rows of women and men to try to hang a felt banner from the balcony while others began tossing fliers into the air. Two women made their way to the DJ stand and began to sing 'Ave Maria'," he wrote.

He cited the Bible Thump organization's own announcement of other items members brought into the church, including "a megaphone, blessed salt, chrism, Holy Water by the bucket load, Holy Oil in SuperSoakers, prayer cloths ..."

According to the religious Lansing City Calvary newspaper – which reported it was notified of the protest ahead of time and sent a reporter along instead of warning the club – the protesters also screamed at dancers and pulled the club's fire alarm. Printed material protesters distributed said, "We specialize in confronting Christophobia, Judeophobia and every and all other forms of oppression."

For further developments go here, as I may have gotten a few tiny details wrong.

-J.

It's almost that time of the year!

2008-11-13T09:21:00.003-05:00

I think people should start getting in the mood for the season by listening to festive music.

Classics such as:

Away In A Kenyan
Don We Now Our Gay Apparel
A Child This Day Is Born And Put In The Janitor's Closet
All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Full Terms
ACORN, We Have Gotten By
Biden Will Be Ringing
VERY Blue Christmas
Christians Roasting On An Open Fire
Deck The Halls According To New Federal Safe-Decking Mandates
Do You Hear What I Hear? Then Maybe You Should Stop Watching MSNBC
Frosty The Weatherman
Go Tell It On The Mountain, Chased by BATF Agents
God Rest Ye Rev. Wright
Grandma Got Euthanized By A Reindeer
Change! The Herald Angels Sing
Holly Jolly Biden
I Heard CNN On Christmas Day
I Saw Daddy Exchanging Vows With Santa Claus
I Saw Three Solar Powered Ships
I Want an Olbermann for Christmas
I'll Be Home For Christmas On Furlough From That Community Service Thing
It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Chris Matthews
It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year (likely moved to April 15)
Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Barack
Jolly Birth Certificate
Joy To The One
You're A Mean One, Mr. Gingrich
O Come, All Ye Faithful, Where We Can Get You All At Once
O Little Town Of Bethlehem, In PLO Control
O Rahm, O Rahm Emanuel!
O Tannenbaum, Meet O Khalidi
Barackin' Around The Christmas Tree
Rudolph The Red Star Reindeer
Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Amnesty
Silent Night For Talk Radio
Silver And Gold To Hedge Against Inflation
The Last Noel
The Little Drummer Biden
Up On The House Rezko Bought
We Wish You A Merry Christmas, Good Luck Getting Gifts
What Unwanted Child Is This?
While Shepherds Pretended To Watch Their Flocks

-J.

Our friends on the left were 100% correct.

2008-11-12T16:59:00.003-05:00

Voting "the wrong way" will lead to blacklisting

Look.

-J.

Prayers gone to waste?

2008-11-12T08:54:00.004-05:00

Over at the lovely and gracious Karen's there is a rather effervescent discussion on prayers seemingly unanswered. The Cliffs NotesTM of the thing run something like this:

1- God, it is Your will that X is right and Y is wrong
2- We prayed -- super-hard! -- for X and against Y. We had novenas, Rosaries, we fasted, etc.
3- Instead, Y and not X will come to pass.
4- Huh?

And I was thinking (since I spend a colossal amount of time in my own head anyway) about prayer.

What I came away with is that while God hears all sincere prayers -- especially prayers related to His will being done, which will be done -- we have to trust Him on the timing of His will being done. Which is not easy, because we are fallen creatures and He is an unfallen Creator. The result of this fallen-creature thing is that it "darkened our understanding, weakened our will, and left us a strong inclination to evil."

So we don't understand what God is got in mind and since we can't respond to His doings with comprehension, we have to respond with faith. (This reminds me of all those times when I tell Joey "Oh, will you just TRUST me?")

Now, prayer will sometimes change circumstances when and how God sees fit. (Which is not exactly according to our plan, which frustrates the @#$% out of us, don't think I am unaware of this. God's not unaware, either.) But prayer ALWAYS changes our ability to react and cope and adjust. Put another way, prayer will not necessarily change the shape and weight of the cross you must bear if you are to follow Him, but it will give you the ability to bear it better.

So don't quit praying.

-J.

No, seriously

2008-11-11T16:47:00.002-05:00

This is nothing more than voting against Born Alive legislation taken to its logical, if grisly, extremes.

What IS holding up Judgment Day?

-J.

Some suggestions.

2008-11-10T17:09:00.004-05:00

Since it looks like maybe we'll have to celebrate this new holiday, I came up with some guidance as to how to best do so.

HAGGADAH FOR The One Day

This is the fruitcake of our affliction, which our ancestors bought from a coop bakery managed by a bald guy with a ponytail.

All who are in need, come and celebrate The One with us.
All who are hungry, come and partake of this fruitcake, as The One's tenure pretty much implies, "Let them eat cake."
This year we watch The One coming to power and ruling, next year may our 401(k) not be cast into the janitor's closet.

Some have the custom to place the gift-wrapped presents under the tree so that they will pique the curiosity of the children so that they will ask the Four essential questions:

1- How come I have presents and The One didn't visit us yet?
2- Did Tony Rezko bring gold, Rev. Wright frankincense and Bill Ayers myrrh? Or am I getting all those guys mixed up?
3- What is this tingling in my leg?
4- Why is Keith Olbermann off his meds?

We were slaves to the Republicans, working eleven days a week with no benefits, and then the Democrats took Congress, and allowed us a four-day workweek and many holidays. Now if the Democrats had not gotten their act together, then we, and our sons, and even our grandsons, would still have to wait for The One, waiting to be delivered from acceptable tax rates and judges who narrowly go by the written word. Of course, our daughters and granddaughters still await their salvation.

There are four types of children who ask questions on The One Day: the wise one, the bad one, the unintelligent one, and the one who does not know to ask.
- What does the wise one ask? I don't know. He managed to flee to the Cayman Islands.
- What does the bad one ask? He says, "What is UP with this holiday?" Since he absents himself from the bosom of the family, you must shun him from the table, and he will go to the Cayman Islands with his brother to be left the Hell alone.
- What does the unintelligent one ask? He asks, "What's this?" You answer him, "This is government cheese."
- To the one who does not even know to ask, you must tell him, "At least you voted like the man who gave you the bottle in the paper bag told you."

If we would have a puff piece from CNN, but not have an endorsement from The Washington Post, it would have been enough.
If we would have an endorsement from The Washington Post, but not get an injunction from a Clinton-appointed judge, it would have been enough.
If we would get an injunction from a Clinton-appointed judge, and not get a community organizer, it would have been enough.
If we would get a community organizer, but not get a Democrat legislature, it would have been enough.
If we would get a Democrat legislature, but not a Democrat Governor, it would have been enough.
If we would have a Democrat Governor and not gotten rid of George Bush, it would have been enough.
If we would have gotten rid of George Bush, but not see Democrats win the House of Representatives, it would have been enough.
If we would Democrats win the House of Representatives, but not see Democrats win the Senate, it would have been enough.
If we would see the Democrats win the Senate, and not have The One ruling us, it would have been enough.

(Pick up the Kool-AidTM and say:) But we do have a puff piece from CNN, and we have an endorsement from The Washington Post, and we got an injunction from a Clinton-appointed judge, and we got a community organizer, and we got a Democrat legislature, a Democrat Governor, and rid of George Bush, and we watched the Democrats win the House of Representatives, and saw the Democrats win the Senate, and so we will now toast The One, and pray that we do not get voter's remorse in the morning: "Yay One!!"

Next year in what's left of Jerusalem.

-J.

This is just cool.

2008-11-09T23:31:00.004-05:00

The wine website to which I contribute -- stay tuned for some Thanksgiving selections -- has just gotten a bit of a nice write up.

That is all.

-J.

Run, don't walk.

2008-11-08T16:11:00.004-05:00

OK.

Let me slap on my Official Catechist Hat.

As an Official Catechist, I am aghast that children are being subjected to books like these.

For those of you unwilling to engage in the click-and-read necessary to get the whole panorama, let me offer you some tidbits. (The more robustly Traditional among you, please brace yourselves.) All emphasis is mine.

Kindergarten: "This is what Saint Francis did. He blessed all the animals."
1st Grade: "Jesus did not want his followers to be afraid. He said to them, “Peace be with you.” (Luke 24:36) Jesus promised his followers that he would send them a helper."
3rd Grade: "Leader: Be still and quiet. Place your hands on your knees with your palms up..." and "At other times we pray with hands folded or with arms open wide. Sometimes people even pray by dancing!"
6th Grade: "As the Book of Genesis continues, we learn that God is greatly displeased with human beings. They were not being faithful stewards of the world."

Not everything in the books is raving heterodoxy, natch. But much of it is wildly vapid (I mean, c'mon, having kids draw even into 4th grade?) and, as my oldest boy would say, "all bongos and kumbaya." The tone is, to me, real-l-l-l-l-ly dumbed-down. The inclusive language is sometimes (not always) jarring and artificial.

This series also has, in my view, a decided list to port. If your parish uses this series my advice is: Constant vigilance!

Oy.

-J.

Ribbed for your pleasure

2008-11-07T18:07:00.004-05:00

Since the blogosphere, as the lovely and gracious Karen (in honor of whose bizarro sensibilities I offer the title above) has aptly decreed, is now on a foodie kick; and since we managed to get to the market; and since this has been a relatively cool (for us, anyway) autumn, I decided to make one of the very first Real Grown Up edibles I ever made* only I'd try some flavor variations.

So, I bring you

Chipotle Braised Short Ribs of Beef with Tropical Gremolata

(Serves two, but it doubles or triples very nicely if you have the hardware and/or patience for this sort of thing. Well worth it.)

Sea salt
Freshly ground black pepper
Peanut oil (or whatever you are not allergic to)
1 lime
4 cups beef stock
7-8 short ribs, bone in, about 1¾ lbs (cut into individual ribs, not across)
1 small yellow onion (sweet onions are fine, but avoid the "supersweets")
4 cloves garlic
2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro (coriander leaf)
2 chipotle chiles (the kind packed in "adobo" which you'll also need)

Preheat oven to 300F/150C.

Dice the onion, smash three cloves garlic to a paste, and also mince two chipotle peppers and leave them on standby.

Heat oil in a Dutch oven (or stockpot of equivalent size) over medium-high heat. Pat the ribs dry then season both sides of ribs with salt and pepper. When the oil shimmers (but is NOT smoking!) add half the ribs and brown on all sides until you get a good sear. Repeat this with the other half of the ribs. (You don't want to cover more than 1/2 of the pot's bottom. So, if you end up doing this in 3 batches or only in one, don't panic.)

Once the ribs have seared, add the onions and saute about 1 minute to caramelize lightly. Add garlic and cook until JUST fragrant. Stir in the chipotles, and 4 tbsp of adobo. Add the stock to just cover ribs (figure 4 cups, but use the least amount you can get away with). Make sure to stir along the bottom of the pot to bring up and dissolve the caramelized bits. This is key. Bring to a gentle simmer, then put in the oven for about 3 hours. Check back frequently to make sure the liquid does not boil. You want some moderate bubbling along the edges of the liquid, but no more. Any hotter and your ribs will become too tough. A ~~Crock-PotTM~~slow cooker would be ideal.

Mince the remaining clove of garlic as finely as your patience will allow. Grate the zest off the lime. Toss these with the cilantro. That's your gremolata. (The traditional Italian gremolata is garlic/lemon zest/parsley) I just came up with this variation after the whole arugula/rocket thing.

When the ribs are done, c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y take them out (tongs are ideal) and set aside on a warmed platter. Grab a ladle and skim the prodigious amount of fat floating (most of the fat in this dish will render into the liquid) atop the now-sauce. DO NOT SKIP THIS STEP. Puree the remaining braising liquid with (ideally) an immersion blender** and dump into a small pot. Put this saucepan over medium heat and reduce to about the consistency of heavy ("double") cream. Adjust salt and pepper and add a spritz of lime juice. Take your ribs and ladle with sauce. Top the ribs with your gremolata and serve. (Or, do what I used to do, just sprinkle cilantro leaves.)

I suggest serving atop/along some rice with scallions and/or almonds. Polenta (cheeseless) or plain tamales wouldn't be bad, either. Pretty much anything in the corn family would be good, when you think about it.

So there,

-J.

* Astute readers will recall this was the first unqualified praise I'd ever gotten from my dad.
** Or CAREFULLY, in small batches, in a blender. If you do it in large batches you'll end up wearing a lot of it and scrubbing your walls of the rest.