JMGarciaIII

 As you guys know, it's not easy to get your material to the attention of someone who can make you an offer the most prominent feature is a cubic acre of money coming to you on a regular basis. In the Covid Time, it's even harder, since the people who'd give your stuff (positive, we hope) coverage have all been furloughed. So, I decided to make it easier to chew and swallow by recording (properly!) many of my pilot drafts, and making them forwardable. It is a bit of work to get it done right, but to not trigger any of you with suspense issues, here is the second rough cut of The Lost Keys which I created in partnership with Miriam Trogdon (Last Man Standing, etc.)

Here is the RIGHT way to do this. Start by slicing pickles. NOT the sweet kind, and (ideally) not the ones that sit shelf-stably at room temperature. You need the crunch. I'spose you could get away with the pre-sliced ones, but I like my surface:mass ratio just so , and the Pickle Industrial Complex will not comply. (I'll post my homemade ones in the very near future.) Take Cuban bread, or Cuban rolls or, if you live in the provinces, something in the egg bread family (which turns this from a Cubano to a Medianoche , because it's better to have a pretty authentic Sandwich B than a wildly inauthentic Sandwich A, but whatever) split them. and mustardize them. The classic choice is plain ol' yellow mustard but I like the "deli" style mustard better. You do whatever you want. Some people, bless them, like mayonnaise in this sandwich. That's just bad-WRONG, but you do whatever. (I'm judging you with my thoughts.) Then you lay down your pickle coverage

Today's entry will be a brief recap of Thanksgiving 2021. It's very important to stress the process of getting Thanksgiving up-and-running started sometime around February. It gives you something to do as you and Lou Bega dance to Lockdown Number Five. Anyway. If you are lucky, you will have a stationer nearby which carries Crane & Co. or similar. If you are diligent you will be popping by on a semi-regular basis, and if you are assiduous, you will head directly for the clearance bin to the exclusion of all other temptations. For it is there, the clearance section, on some fine day/evening in February when you will find Thanksgiving stationery, forlorn and forgotten-ish, at +/-90% off. You should pounce. The same applies -- should you not have such accouterments at your disposal -- to tablecloths, napkins and serve/flatware (disposable is fine, provided they are attractive enough). (For these, I scour Williams-Sonoma, both my nearby stores and online , as they sometimes

Today is National Bourbon Day . Which is a good thing, I s'pose, as Bourbon is a close 2nd in the category of My Favorite Ardent Spirits. We all know about my favorite Bourbon cocktail -- the Whisk(e)y Sour, details upcoming thereon -- but when the thermometer starts to creep upward, chasing the spike in humidity, something minty is called for. Now, it seems that normal people who grow mint have it overrun their yard. I end up with a terracotta pot of damp dirt and beige twigs. Still, dum spiro, spero . So, in order to not make nothing but a waterfall of mojitos all summer* long, here's my choice cocktail: Joe's Julep 2 oz. Bourbon (my go-to for mixing is Maker's Mark) 1 oz. Rye (Templeton's is nice, if you're especially manly-manlike, add an extra ½ oz.) 1 dash Peychaud's Bitters 18 (!) mint leaves, any varietal, but Yerba Buena ( mentha nemorosa ) is optimal. 1 oz. superfine sugar (just put regular sugar in the food processor and zap it for as

Another gem from the archives

 New Orleans is one of my two favorite cities for a quickie getaway with She Who Decides. Great food -- if you're delicate of palate, you have my pity -- sensational people, great bars, and just a Glorious Vibe. Even the stuff you never think of (pizza, say) is shatteringly good.

If you look around online, you'll find shaving experts offering their suggested shaving starter kit. Aye, 'tis a good kit, too. So, in the interest of variety and all that, here's my everyday rig, although you new kids would do better to stick those guys' suggestions, since they are Professionals. Anyway, here's mine: Gillette Adjustable DE safety razor . Contrary to popular opinion, I far prefer the slim handle, with the year codes I through N. The loss of heft is more than compensated by the added maneuverability. You should also find what setting works with your choice of blades and quit futzing with it. With the blades listed below, I am at #6. Israeli Personna “Super+” (aka “no-name” or "Crystal") DE razor blades . These truly kick arse, at a ridiculous price. You can also score them on eBay. Vulfix #2234 badger shaving brush I even got it to match my scuttle. I can get my geek on just as impressively as anyone else, sue me. Proraso/Bigelow shav

The lovely & gracious Kim introduced me, on Twitter, to the equally lovely and similarly gracious Ruth. Twitter, alas is the social media equivalent to HFCS. If you really want to know what happened to my blog, just visualize it being hacked into neat-ish 280-character chunks and fed to the Blue Bird. But I digress. Anyway. Ruth is an evangelist for good-and-good-for-you foods. Her merely saying "Quinoa tabbouleh" (granting the lovely and gracious Badger may have previously come up with such a concept even if she didn't get a chance to brand it as snappily) altered my worldview. Among the gospels of her evangelism is no-knead bread. This is what prompted Kim to introduce us, as æons ago, Kim was asking (again on Twitter) for thoughts on same, and I leapt insomniacally up and sent her my version, which involves a TINY bit of kneading (a riff on CI's, itself a riff on Leahy's original) and she loved it so much she wept profanely in joy for hours. So! N

We are in that phase of Number One Son's last year where all the "Graduating Students" activities...stuff is going on. Banquets, presentations, etc., etc. With each, there is usually a letter sent home. This letter explains the details of that specific event. Attire, dates for sending in deposits (if any), contact persons and, where applicable, the rules and regulations governing the event. One such event is his Prom, and the letter arrived a few days ago. Given the nature of the event, the letter was (not unexpectedly) somewhat longer than usual, owing to the rules-and-regulations portion which was of an ample and generous size. In the process of getting all of the details of this event squared away, I sat down with Joey to make sure that all deadlines were met, that he was not out of compliance with any unforeseen rule. That sort of thing. It was then I ran into what he explained was "the Falcon rule." One of the things I have always noted is that EV

One day, roughly 2 weeks out from Christmas, my wife announced that a "free" chalet in Beech Mountain, NC would be available to us for the days around New Year's, as the owners -- I'd have to draw you a flowchart of our relationship to them -- would be spending that time in Hawai'i. Make a note of that. Also, kindly note that the census numbers encompassed by the "us" abovementioned was in the "10-12" range. Further note that my beloved had announced , rather than inquired. Resigned to my fate, as befalls any wise husband whose prime marital directive is to preserve peace in the valley come what may, I nodded assent. (Resistance is futile, and comes with the added cost of having argued and still lost.) Furthermore, my main writing partner Karen lives in the general area and I owed her a massive (7 file boxes worth) load of cookbooks, etc. and I figured, quite reasonably, this would have the effect of a palliative salve on all the things